Eithan Osborne Drops Sizzling Remix Of His Biggest Surf Cinema Hits

Stacking clips is a stoic exercise.

The urge to satisfy sponsors, build a social media following, and chase fleeting dopamine hits often conflicts with the pursuit of creating quality surf cinema.

Noa Deane didn’t mince his words when he said, “I could do reels, surf two-foot beachies and hoard cash, but that’s moral suicide.” 

There’s a line of thinking in finance that says ‘the best shares you never sell’, and it’s that kind of delayed gratification which marks astute investing. 

Analogous in surfing terms, is not diminishing your image by constantly feeding an audience B-grade ‘content’ for cheap hits of virtual affirmation. “Shameless and self-promotional” is how Dane Reynolds described one cast of modern freesurfer. Perhaps a little myopic too?

“This is the great irony of social media: the more you immerse yourself in it, the more lonely and depressed you become,” noted NYU Psychologist Johnathan Haidt in The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness.

See Michelle Goldberg’s NYT op-ed: We should all know less about each other 

On December 10, 2024, Eithan Osborne released his profile film with Chapter 11 titled ‘Skinny Meat Head’ (SMH) exploring his dual identity – an incredible freesurfer capable of miraculous sessions where he lands absolutely everything, and an inconsistent competitor oscillating between perfect 10s and 2s – as the meat of the storytelling. 

Chapter 11 filmmaker Hunter Martinez told Stab SMH began filming in January 2022, during Osborne’s campaign for CT qualification in Hawaii, and initially had a nine month deadline at the behest of Bong.

But ‘Aton’ or ‘Air-Con’ as his friends have monikered him, who over indexes on FOMO as a personality trait, pursued some side quests in parallel. 

“During the whole two year process, he was also helping Harry film for Motel Hell in Morocco, Ireland and South Oz. Then there was Zipper with Stab and Interlusion and Double Vision for Bong. In the end I was like, ‘dude, what the fuck. This is your profile film. Why don’t you just save this stuff?’” recalled Martinez. 

But that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Eithan also competed in two Vans Pipe Masters, the Swatch Nines event, eight QS and seven Challenger Series events, before clinching victory at Stab High Japan. 

“He wants to be everywhere, doing everything, all at once,” Dane Reynolds giggles face in palm in SMH. 

However comical Eithan’s inability to say “no” may be, when you boil down his best clips from the various projects he undertook in the past two years, the result is nothing short of spectacular.

Now you may eat your marshmallow.