Stab Magazine | Watch Griffin Colapinto Get Roasted By Brazilians (And Justifiably So!)

Now Live: Best Surfing I've Ever Seen With Nate Lawrence

626 Views

Watch Griffin Colapinto Get Roasted By Brazilians (And Justifiably So!)

Gossip Girl: Saquarema is loose AF!
 

news // Jun 23, 2019
Words by stab
Reading Time: 3 minutes

For all the keyboard smack talk about Brazil, Gossip Girl’s been having a hell time in Saq Town, and so has most of the World Tour and their entourage.

The Oi Rio Pro landing smack on a major public holiday has amplified the sleepy, surfy Rio suburb’s annual blowout to truly wall-shaking levels. 

After spending ten hours kicking soccer balls on the beach, the local fans take to the streets of Saquarema with a fucking purpose, the parties up and down Ave. Oceanica going well into the morning hours and surfers who didn’t make the cut in yesterday’s victory-at-sea conditions more than happy to put the loss behind them and indulge in some local flavor, enjoying their unprecedented celebrity here in Brazil as they deserve to (literally any pro surfer with a sticker on their nose is famous here, getting taped for selfies every fourth step, signing autographs on other surfers’ WSL jerseys, etc.)

However, if the Hurley boys look tired, it ain’t from too many caipirinhas, but from their team house being hemmed in on both sides by two massive parties: the opulent beachfront house the WSL rented for their Corona- and Red Bull/Gin-fueld late arvo and evening blowouts, and the pop-up party in the tent that just got erected across the street. Poor Wade Carmichael’s window might as well be on the fucking tent-party’s dancefloor!

After struggling to get through Flavio Padaratz’s afternoon set of Ben Harper covers, or the one song Bradley Cooper and Lady GaGa sing in A Star Is Born at the WSL party, Gossip Girl stumbled out into the streets to join the masses, but not before gleaning the hottest slice of drama from the event so far.

Two days ago, Jake “Snake” Paterson posted a freesurf clip of Stephanie Gilmore shredding in her sparkly blue Roxy Superwoman suit, and Griff Colapinto getting roasted, mostly by ladies, but also by a stocky goofy foot, Big Chumbo as he’s known here in Saq Town, father to local heroes Lucas and Joao. Without context, the clip lit on fire with anti-Brazilian sentiments, everyone from Kelly Slater to Taj Burrow chiming in on how real the struggle is here in Saq Town. 

“It never ceases to blow my mind. I guess they actually wanted to surf WITH the pros,” – Kelly Slater. 

“I thought I missed the tour until I saw this,” – Taj Burrow. 

“Drop in fest,” – Shane Beschen

“Hahahahaha that’s out of this world” – Parker Coffin

“Collaborative effort,” – Tom Carrol

208 comments later, the clip earned the most Nationalistic vitriol since the clip Snake posted of Jesse Mendes and Mikey Wright’s curfuffle at North Point last year. Well, according to our dearest local lords here in Saquarema, Snake’s got a reputation for stirring up the anti-Brazzo pot, and that the clip didn’t show the whole story at all.

Turns out Griffin had casually burned a local star, Marina Werneck, and apparently didn’t apologize. The locals were not impressed, and signaled to the lineup that Griff was not to be left un-roasted. 

We haven’t seen Griff to hear his side, but we’re sure he’s keeping quiet on the subject for good reason.  

Meanwhile, yesterday while the event ran at big, lumpy Itauna, three hundred meters down the beach at Bahia, Little Chumbo, aka Joao Chumbinho, Lucas’ younger brother (who just won his first QS in Chile, and who will surely be a massive threat in a year or two) was getting blown out of absolute massive pits with a handful of the local stars. 

While many claimed it was “a little too inconsistent” for them to make the call to move the event down the beach, from where we were sitting (in the lineup, looking over the shoulder of proper eight-foot bombs) there were three dozen perfect-10s flailing up behind the rock. 

With that, we’re heading back down to the beach: it’s a gorgeous Saturday in Saquarema, and there are too many beautiful bodies out and about to be cooped up indoors. 

XOXO,

GG. 

Comments

Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up

Advertisement

Most Recent

The Best Surfing I’ve Ever Seen: Nate Lawrence

Kolohe, Cola Bros, Luke Davis, Crane, and "the most magical 3 weeks ever had in…

Apr 25, 2024

Snapper To Return To The CT In 2025(!) + WSL Announces Season Wildcards

Next year is looking up. Here's what we know...

Apr 25, 2024

Kelly Slater Will Surf In Tahiti And Fiji CT Events — And He’s Bringing A Secret Weapon With Him

What's it like to coach an 11x champ? We asked Glenn "Micro" Hall.

Apr 24, 2024

Watch: A Masterclass In Belated Drops At The Teepee Capital Of The World

And the rest of the O’Neill team sticks the landing in Hawaii.

Apr 24, 2024

How Sophie McCulloch Broke Her Back At The Box Three Days After Being Cut From The CT

The untold brutal side story of finals day in WA.

Apr 24, 2024

The Cut Wasn’t The Surf Fans’ Idea — But It Might Be Our Fault

Psychoanalyzing surfing’s highly sadistic audience (us!).

Apr 23, 2024

How Surfers (And Skiers/Snowboarders) Could Be Using Buoys Better

Snow in Japan = waves at Pipe = snow in Utah, @PowderBuoy told us.

Apr 22, 2024

How Did Sydney’s Hottest Landscape Architect Stack So Many Clips Less Than 10Kms From Centrepoint Tower? 

Fraser Dovell is a man of culture, taste and jabbing North Av lefts in the…

Apr 22, 2024

Full Frame: The Other Side Of Nazaré

The death of a wave, and the birth of an entire genre of surf. 

Apr 21, 2024

Jack Robbo Double Beats Double John At Margies, Gabriela Bryan Dodges Dolphins For Maiden Win

The cut is finished - WA finals recap.

Apr 21, 2024

Watch: A Leisurely Day With Fingal’s-Most-Wanted Foamball Wrangler

Lungi Slabb and filmmaker Beren Hall offer insight into the exact specs which bring GoPro…

Apr 20, 2024

The Stab Interview: Chippa Wilson

On childhood bullies, surfing bigger waves, the making of 'Zipper', and what's on the horizon…

Apr 19, 2024

Medina Cooked at WSL Judges’ BBQ, George Pittar Flares En Route To Finals Day

Four heats, a nine point ride, and some brotherly tears.

Apr 19, 2024

Ferrari Boyz: Harry Bryant (Redux)

A Land Cruiser, a shitting collie, a tank of petrol, and a wild Haz in…

Apr 18, 2024

Surprise! Margies Ran At Southside Today

No rest for the wicked - day 5 WA recap.

Apr 18, 2024

A Dispatch From The Best Run Of Swell Northwest Australia May Ever See

Three weeks of pumping surf, two decades ago, that changed this writer's life.

Apr 17, 2024

Nichols, Silva + Spencer Cut, Robinson Lives To Fight Another Day

Waiting: a polite term for slowly losing your mind - here's what happened in WA…

Apr 17, 2024

The Pupo Brothers Will Face Off At Margs, And Only The Winner Can Stay On Tour

Let's look at every match-up that will seal a CT surfer's fate.

Apr 16, 2024
Advertisement