Stab’s picks from the Volcom Store

Stereotypes have been manufactured for sinister purposes! Don’t let them steal your sunshine. Shopping’s not just for chicks. It gets you high! Meet our dealer! And their dope:

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Rockaway Perfecto Leather Jacket

You know the cliches, now know the truth.

From Jimi Hendrix to Justice, from James Dean to Daft Punk, the one reoccurring theme is leather. Add yourself to the list. Start your legacy. Make history now.

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Cromly Crew Tee

Stripes (1981) : The story of a man who wanted to keep the world safe for democracy… and meet girls

Despite Billy Murray’s assumptions that joining the army was like signing yourself into a health retreat – being proved wrong – nowhere did it reinforce that bearing stripes don’t attract the opposite sex. Invest in the right cause.

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2×4 Denim Jeans

Numerology can be a mindfuck, religious arithmetic too. Yet the largest meeting point of interconnected souls (in human history!) seem to be under the consensus that 9 equals truth… Which can leave you wondering modern day connotations. 99%? Is that some internet gang? Maybe. Don’t they say everyone is a member? Close, but obviously not everyone. Do sardonic sentences imply anything? Yes. Are Volcom alluding to anything with their $99.99 pricing? No.

As per the forth word in the first paragraph its best to just relax. With enough sag to skate in and tight enough that your bike chain won’t eat denim for brunch what better place than here, what better time than now.

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Single Stone Leather Wallet

If your name is Kolohe Andino you certainly don’t need this. But if it isn’t consider this your beacon of freedom. Why? ‘Cause ya can’t obtain no jazz for your hips or puff for your lips if your wealth is restricted entirely to the servers. It’s quite swish looking too. No Costanazas here.

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Beanie

The memo delivered to this author read “cause hard cunts wear this shit along with their beards in summer these days.” Kinda drawing blanks now but I guess I can rebut with the facts, for facts sake. It’s good for cold – some may say “cool” (horrible joke… revoke my income, I get it) climates. Now without an ionosphere of insincerity; if aspiring for perpetual cosiness without dropping your thread game truly is your thing… This is a really great investment.

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Static Mod Boardies

Stash pockets √. Minimal chaff √. Covert branding √. Highly surfable √. Wear your heart on your legs. Scream “I really love olives!!!!” Right here; lord master.

*Note they come in a washed out red and ALA blue too. So apologies for the not entirely necessary affirmation. But all the ticks were trill. Promises.

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Washington St Boardies

Your successors may look back on 2014 as the year Volcom proved that the Costa Rican flag ain’t a bad start for boardshort design inspo. Revolutionary thinking! Award the Stone’s appreciation of the Happy Planet Index here.

And please ignore any hyperbolic or unsubstantiated sentences that you read. For your own good.

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Single Stone Tee

Despite what your history book says most of the greats aren’t white. This is an exception though. It’s clean, it fits, it has that stoned speckle and it certainly doesn’t sit too high on the price spectrum in comparison to competitors. Stay fresh! Live clean!

Bonus: Imagining this tee levitating above your head is good for your crown chakra. Others too.

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Burd SS Tee

“Taking LSD was a profound experience, one of the most important things in my life. LSD shows you that there’s another side to the coin, and you can’t remember it when it wears off, but you know it. It reinforced my sense of what was important — creating great things instead of making money, putting things back into the stream of history and of human consciousness as much as I could.” – Steve Jobs

Share your knowledge!

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Anti Bad Vibe Towel

The name suggests it all. This towel is a badge of love and happiness. Align your chakras instantly. Kick it on the beach or by the pool. Heck, wear it as a shawl. Deflect the neg now and show the world your true colours. Free your mind and your ass will follow. Funkadelic. Merci beaucoup.