Stab Magazine | Comments Of The Week, Edition 60

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Comments Of The Week, Edition 60

As curated by iHusky, with a little help from Noa’s Last Dart.

style // Jul 12, 2016
Words by stab
Reading Time: 3 minutes

Comments 12

12. How The World Tour Gets To J-Bay

“I want to know if Matt Banting books his return flight for after his round 2 heat.” 

brendan huff, scathing. (12 upvotes)

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Comments 11

11. Taj Burrow And Stab: In Covers

“Taj who? Mick just surfed his FIRST J-Bay heat!? Wake up Morgan, call iHusky, email the Australian Prime Minister and get on it Stab! If I don’t see six fucking Mick articles by Heat 12 I’m going to shit on someone’s chest.”

david f, passionate. (4 upvotes)

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Comments 10

10. Here’s How Incredibly Good Nias Has Been

“Wait, what?! The bigger news is, Aritz has his own website. Holy hell. Why tho?”

shooootsbrah saw Aritz rollin’, and he hatin’. (1 upvote)

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Comments 09

9. How To Avoid A Shark Attack, According To Kimi Werner

“Having watched The Shallows, I believe what you should do is to use the shark’s own momentum to have it impale itself on underwater steel rebar. But only do so in the event that setting the shark on fire with whale oil and a flare gun somehow fails to kill said shark, mate.”

Azn Ando, spoiler alert. (3 Upvotes)

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Comments 08

8. Kai Lenny’s Foil Board Clip Will Probably Melt Your Mind

“Laird Hamilton jerked it to this whilst smearing himself with Ghee Butter. He finally has a protege to carry on his legacy.”

Hypto Krypto One Board Quiver, lover of legacy. (4 upvotes)

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Comments 07

7. Not Ironic: Life On The Farm

“I’m going to buy that property, and raise their rent.”

FuegoInTheGut, spiteful, awesome. (17 upvotes)

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Comments 06

6. Dave Rastovich Transitions Into Ambassador Role With Patagonia

“Ohhhh I see… so he is quitting “professional surfing” (surf trips, videos and photos) to embark on a new journey as an “ambassador” (surf trips, videos and photos).”

Les Grossman, realist. (9 upvotes)

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Comments 05

5. A Reel Of Huge Mexican Sand Drains To Enhance Your Day

“I was going to watch this on the way to work but there was a Pikachu nearby and I lost my shit.”

Wiggolly’s Paddling Style, engaged. (6 upvotes)

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Comments 04

4. This Is Not About Sharks: Stab’s Picks For The J-Bay Open

“I’m due for a root but that doesn’t mean I’d back myself next time I go out.”

Noa’s last dart, perspective. (17 upvotes)

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Comments 03

3. The Right Has Become A Tow Circus

“‘Popular wave gets crowded’ – In other news, the sky is blue and water is wet. Thanks Stab.”

Hypto Krypto One Board Quiver, wonderfully sarcastic. (7 upvotes)

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Comments 02

2. Right Foot, Leg And Other “Unidentified” Human Body Parts Wash Up On Copacabana Sand

“Did it have Modom’s Shark Repellent leash attached to it?”

Claiming Medina. (18 upvotes)

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Comments 01

1. John John Florence In “Twelve”

“I bet my virginity that Slater comes out as John’s dad in the finale.”

noadeanesmoustache, predictions. (14 upvotes)

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