Report: Joao Chianca Is Not Here To F*ck Spiders - Stab Mag
586 Views
No arachnoids here. Photo by WSL/Heff

Report: Joao Chianca Is Not Here To F*ck Spiders

Watch the CT rookie’s standout performance on the rock this winter.

cinema // Mar 21, 2022
Words by Ethan Davis
Reading Time: 2 minutes

Joao Chianca went huge at Pipe this season. In his first CT heat ever he drew John, in his backyard, and nearly pipped him with a psycho no-grab backside tube ride that he threaded from deep reminiscent of Bruce Irons. “He’s a supreme tuberider,” warned Leandro Dora ahead of the contest. “And he charges too, so he’s got a good chance at places like Pipe, Chopes, and The Box, for example. If he can keep his cool and surf the way he usually surfs, he’ll surprise a lot of people.”

Chumbinho’s style is refreshingly unpredictable and raw — beautiful to watch in waves of power. “His surfing has a poetic savagery, a là Chris Davidson or Dane Reynolds,” explains Julio Adler, former pro and one of Brazil’s surf media greats. In his round 3 heat, Joao took down Jack Robbo, a fellow Stone rider whose name also belongs in the conversation for one of the best at Banzai. 

Joao’s win saw him advance into the round of 16 and meet up again with none other than… John Florence again. Joao fetched a 16.74 heat total to John’s 17.77 and subsequently fell out of the mix, but not before dropping a 9.87 for one of the best waves of the event – A screaming late drop to butt drag to hands-free stand-up cathedral that blew him into the channel right in front of the 2x World Champ. Joao would’ve won any other heat in that round bar Kelly’s last second GOAT magic he pulled in his heat against Barron Mamiya. 

Joao currently finds himself in #23, three spots outside the mid-year cutoff. Bells and Chumbo don’t scream a match made in heaven, but Chumbinho at the Box or North Point? Ooft. There could be sparks. Let’s hope he can scrape it over the mid-season line for some tube piggery at G-land and Teahupoo.

This clip is a collection of Joao out the front of the Volcom house during his time on the rock. “We tried to do it as raw as possible. Good surfing, no slow mo and old school rap on the tracks,” says filmmaker Bruno Zanin. To which we responded ‘Oath. Good recipe.’

Comments

Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up

Advertisement

Most Recent

Breaking: Gabriel Medina Has A New Coach For 2026

He's a fellow Brazilian world champ, heat tactician, and dare we say the perfect man…

Mar 25, 2026

Teaching People How To Surf Is Now A Legitimate Career Path

Enter the land of private jets and A-list cliques.

Mar 24, 2026

Robbo’s Back On Track(tors), Medina’s Ménage À Trois, Rip Curl Drops Wright, Tenōre In Turmoil 

Some days you’re the dog, some days you’re the hydrant.

Mar 22, 2026

A 15-Year-Old Snowboard Phenom + A 3-Minute Tube Hunter Walk Into StabMic

“If I didn’t have a GoPro, no one would believe me,” says Koa Smith.

Mar 21, 2026

Stab Interview: Israel’s First CT Surfer

Anat Lelior on military service, online hate, and her unique path to professional surfing.

Mar 19, 2026

Watch: Episode Two Of ‘VELA’ Featuring John John Florence

This time with Nate, Ivan, and another untouched reef pass.

Mar 19, 2026

So, What Do CT Surfers Think About Manu Bay?

A scene report from the Tasman Sea with Jack Robinson, Connor O’Leary, Luke Cederman, and…

Mar 18, 2026

What’s It Actually Like Surfing Mundaka?

A day in the life of a non-local goofy.

Mar 17, 2026

How To: Quit Professional Surfing

At what point do you walk away from the endless QS > CS > CT…

Mar 17, 2026

Why Did 50 Men Just March Into The Sahara With Surfboards And Moroccan Flags?

The story of a decades-old feud and the desert wave it exposed.

Mar 15, 2026

Meet The 2026 Qualifying Class

The CS is done; the CT begins in two weeks.

Mar 15, 2026

SEOTY: Imaikalani deVault Stars In ‘Little Bits’

"He pretty much got to the CT on talent alone.”

Mar 13, 2026

JJF + Dane Reynolds Recall The Best Session Of Their Lives

"It felt like you could do anything you wanted.”

Mar 13, 2026

86% Of Women’s CS Qualifiers Are Currently From Europe

Who are 'Euroforce Femme' and where did they come from?

Mar 11, 2026

Watch: Episode One Of ‘VELA’ Featuring John John Florence

A perfect empty right, a shallow empty left, and one 3x World Champ.

Mar 11, 2026

Unlocked: Brody Mulik Stars In ‘fourteen.’

Homeschooled at The Box and Tombies, the fifteen-year-old might be Western Australia's best student.

Mar 11, 2026

Watch: Patti Zhou In Her Element(s)

Snow, water, but mostly air.

Mar 11, 2026

Watch: Quiksilver’s King Of The Groms Final

Kash Brown, Mananalu Chandler, Brody Mulik, and Dylan Donegan try to freesurf their way into…

Mar 11, 2026
Advertisement