'Almost' May Not Count, But It Sure Is Entertaining - Stab Mag

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‘Almost’ May Not Count, But It Sure Is Entertaining

Locally-sourced equatorial fruits mask a potent mezcal kick.

cinema // Mar 13, 2022
Words by Ethan Davis
Reading Time: < 1 minute

“It’s hard to measure almost, because almost doesn’t matter” – John Dutton (Yellowstone). 

While Montana rancher John Dutton and the WSL deem *almosts* inconsequential, the value of almosts is not lost on us, provided they demand sufficiently technical heroics pleasing to the mind’s eye. Mauro Diaz, Ale Moreda, Sabastian Soto, Tommy Bursian, Nico Moreda, Christian Riviera, Otto Flores, and Wesley Toth here aggregate a great number of almosts that would index low on a WSL scorecard but highly in terms of our amusement. 

“These dudes get a couple crazy waves out at this kinda shifty slab which is located somewhere tropical,” says Metal Neck. The tropics are regarded anywhere between 23°05′ north and south of the equator, so go figure. 

Another fun fact regards the etymology of ‘Metal Neck’ which is not just a cool posse name. A ‘Metal Neck’ is “when you headbang so hard at a damn metal show, your neck hurts. It’s a combination of your neck hurting, and metal,” Andrew Doheny told Stab upon releasing the OG Metal Neck featuring Droid, Ford Archbold, Creed McTaggart, Bobby Okvist, and Metal Jimmy. 

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