Feet Too Dainty For The Reef? Let Mason Ho Show You How
Introducing Uncle Timmy’s reef shoe theory.
There’s a life-threatening predicament that has stirred up quite a controversy in the wide world of surfing. It is a known fact that reefs provide a solid platform for ultra mega death slabs, but they remain difficult to traverse without slicing open the achilles.
As pioneers of surfing the world’s most inconvenient waves, Mason Ho and Sheldon Pashion have been fighting on the forefront of this war, demanding answers. Their most recent experimenting derives from the teachings of quantum physicist Uncle Timmy. While Uncle’s scientific background may seem fictitious, his Reef Shoe theory holds water. ‘If one puts on shoes to comfortably navigate pointy rocks, then one can throw said shoes back to shore afterwards, because why not, faka.’
Some conspiracy-theorists have highlighted the fact that functional reef booties do exist and could easily resolve this global crisis, but we folks at Stab would never ever shine a light on such an absurd concept.
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