SUP Pilot Faces Attempted Murder Charge After Weaponising His Paddle 

Andrew Eric Gustafson, 59, of Morro Bay, has been charged with two felonies for allegedly turning a SUP into both a battering ram and a bludgeon. According to local news sources, State Parks first booked him for attempted murder, though the DA has since dialled it back, trying to split hairs between surf rage and homicidal tendencies.

After being dissatisfied with how a woman had ridden her wave, witnesses said Gustafson, bipedal, ferociously paddled his craft at a woman surfing, hit her from behind, then graduated from vehicular assault to paddle combat. At around 10:45 a.m. Saturday, he allegedly climbed onto her board, verbally abused her, and then forced her head underwater. All the while, allegedly, his SUP paddle remained in his hand.

The victim declined medical treatment. Gustafson’s bail has been slashed from $550,000 to $25,000, and his next hearing is set for September 3.