Podcast: Stab Highway Horrors Revealed

September 16th, 2024, marked an important night in the history of New York City. Sean ‘Puff Daddy’ Combs — once a hip-hop figure tossed around in the same breath as the Notorious B.I.G, now a puffed up business reptilian — finally got his ticket punched. 

After years of whispers and sins buried beneath mountains of cash, he was pulled in on racketeering charges. Meanwhile, on that same night, a pack of surfers — far less adept at stacking cash than Diddy — found themselves in a downtown Manhattan bar, sipping cheap drinks, attempting to wash away the sting of insults flung at them by elderly southern women just days prior. 

“I’m from Texas,” declared an irritated beachgoer, her gaze fixed on Mateus Herdy. “A little birdie told me your slutty surfing Brazilian ass can’t make the tour. It’s been ten damn years now. Get off my beach, son.” With that, she poured a beer over his head.

The Drop has been quiet for a few weeks, largely due to an all-consuming road trip marked by physical and verbal abuse — Stab Highway presented by Monster Energy. 

On top of that, the Quicksilver Festival in France, prior to today, had been more bender than surf comp. “It’s been fucking hilarious,” says Buck, who’s been on the scene all week, though he insists his new daddy duties have kept him out of the gutter. 

Still, the dirt finds him: Jeremy Flores summoning a DJ into a house party at 3 a.m, Dimity Stoyle living up to her doof-queen reputation, and Slater—after losing a heat to Milla Coco Brown (watch her SEOTY entry here) — winning the twinnie round with a trailer fin suspiciously lodged in the tail of his board.

“That’s such bullshit,” critiques Mikey C. “Even in a contest that’s not a contest, Kelly can’t help but try to get the extra competitive edge.” Read about the winners here.

The boys also spill details from our first industry summit, Stab Con, at Waco Surf. “We basically give people from surf brands an excuse to take off work, come to Texas, and feed them waves and beer,” Mikey explains. “Then, we try to convince them that endemic media still matters in a world of performance marketing, so that we can all keep doing our jobs next year.”

Much time has passed since surf podcasting’s most scandalous duo met for a yarn. Listen here as they attempt to wrestle three weeks into 40-minutes.