Kelly Slater Caught Training For 2023 Challenger Series On Eve Of Margaret River Pro

Yesterday, on the eve of the Margaret River Pro waiting period, Kelly Slater was spotted getting supremely tubed at an iconic Australian right-hander.

No, it wasn’t The Box.

Rather than following the herd west to prep for Margie’s (he’s a GOAT, not a sheep for Christ’s sake), Kelly decided to hang on Australia’s east coast after Bells, arriving on the Gold Coast in time for an early-season east swell that set several points, Snapper chief among them, ablaze.

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Kelly posted the above wave, filmed by 18 Seconds‘ Andy Morris, to his Instagram story, stating, “Today was amazing. Wish I had more time before a flight but got one nugget.”

All of which implies that at least one of the following five statements is true:
1. Kelly knows for a fact that the WSL will give him wildcards into this season’s last five events, even if he fails to make the cut at Margs (an event in which Slater needs at least a ninth), so there’s no point in going there early to practice.
2. Kelly believes that the WSL will not give him wildcards into this season’s last five events, nor the first half of the 2024 season, so he’s preemptively training for his 2023 Challenger Series campaign.
3. Kelly does not give a fuck about making the cut, nor a wildcard for that matter, so yolo.
4. Kelly had some business around the Gold Coast that required his presence.
5. Kelly prefers sand-bottomed tubes to The Box’s partially arid coral.

Regardless of reasoning, the GOAT is the GOAT and he’s earned the right to do whatever he damn well pleases before, after, or smack dab in the middle an event window. Just ask your mother.

Frankly, you should be ashamed of yourself for thinking this Snapper soiree would have any impact on Slater’s ability to win Margie’s and every event thereafter, earning an Olympic bid and 12th world title in the process*.

Peasants, the lot of you.

*I will not be betting on Kelly to win his round 1 Margaret River Pro heat.