How To Spend Your Last $230 Betting On COOKING Teahupo'o - Stab Mag

Live Now: How Surfers Get Paid — The Queens of Ascension

What's the over-under on pull-backs today? We'll set the baseline at 7.

How To Spend Your Last $230 Betting On COOKING Teahupo’o

Today will see carnage. Hopefully not in our bank account.

elsewhere // Aug 18, 2022
Words by Michael Ciaramella
Reading Time: < 1 minute

If all goes to the WSL’s/Surfline’s master plans, Teahupo’o should be rilfing today.

10-15 foot, straight offshore, and squarer than a city block.

We’re talking shades of 2014, sans the John-Kelly matchup.

Surf fans around the globe will have their incognito tabs ready, darting dexterously between A+ surf action and Excel spreadsheets, depending on their bosses’ proximity.

The only way to make today even more intoxicating? Putting a little skin in the game.

Self-mutilation not required. But if you want a reminder of just how wrong things can go at Chopes, rewatch Kelia Moniz’s ill-fated but highly applaudable attempt to wrangle the beast on a log in 2000-something.

Stab’s official surf betting partner this season is, and we’ve gone pretty hard with our punts on Tahiti Day 3. Thus far in the event we’re down $25, so let’s hope some of these picks hit.

Day 3 picks: 

  • $20 on Caroline Marx at +125 to win $25
  • $50 on Courtney Conlogue at -105 to win $47
  • $30 on Vahine Fierro at -105 to win $28
  • $50 on Kelly Slater at +100 to win $50
  • $40 on Caio Ibelli at +180 to win $72
  • $40 on Jadson Andre at +400 to win $160

Make your own picks here.


Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up


Most Recent

2025 CT Rumors: A Hollow Left To Host WSL Finals, Sunset Axed For Big Oil, And Surfing’s Most Viral Wave Returns

Edging closer to a modern-day dream tour.

May 28, 2024

Full Frame: His & Hers Tow Tango Somewhere In Aus

Date night with Imogen and Cortney Brown.

May 27, 2024

Top Two Women Axed Early, Three Join The 9+ Club, Kelly Reveals Reptile-Inspired Baby Name

Hint: it rhymes with Slater and could eat you (or a zebra).

May 26, 2024

The Stab Interview: 5x CT Winner, Budding Entrepreneur, And Stab High Invitee Julian Wilson

If you never retire, you can't call it a comeback.

May 25, 2024

The Best Surfing I’ve Ever Seen: Lachlan Mckinnon

How often does a filmer pay for the surfer's plane ticket?

May 25, 2024

Hurley Can Now Legally Rent A Car

A quarter-century in the surf game is no small feat.

May 24, 2024

Airs On Trees: Bosiny Cracked The High-Performance Wood Surfboard Code 

Feat. Paulownia wood reinforced with Kevlar, these boards are as light as PU and loaded with spring. 

May 23, 2024

What’s In A Wedge?

Enjoyable water movement, explained by an expert.

May 23, 2024

Watch: Tosh Tudor In ‘Tube Therapy’

The 19-year old offers prescriptive insights into Desert Point karma, backside tube poise, and Off-The-Wall…

May 23, 2024

Swell’s En Route, Slater’s Involved, Here Comes Teahupo’o… 

A Tahiti Pro preview.

May 22, 2024

Can Medina Overcome His CT Drought In Tahiti?

Tahurai Henry offers his picks for the SHISEIDO Tahiti Pro

May 21, 2024

The 35 Best Song Pairings In Surf Films, As Ranked By Dane Reynolds, Taylor Steele & You

From Noa Deane and Courtney Love, to Andy Irons and Coldplay, to Creed McTaggart and…

May 20, 2024

Is This The Most Cost Efficient Way To Noticeably Improve Your Surfing In A Single Month?

All you can eat for $1500 AUD at URBNSURF Melbourne.

May 20, 2024

Watch And Learn: How To Score A Solo Sesh At 8-Foot Teahupo’o With Leonardo Fioravanti

Skip lunch and gorge.

May 19, 2024

Full Frame: The Story Behind The Photo You’ve Seen 1,000 Times

A viral ménage à trois in Bali.

May 18, 2024

Meet The Man Who Runs Kelly Slater’s Burgeoning Surf Empire

The Stab Interview with Dylan Slater. 

May 18, 2024

How Surfers Get Paid: Season 2, Episode 4

80+ interviews later, it's time to "send out the chicks".

May 17, 2024

How To Get To Stab High Japan

BYO ligaments. 

May 16, 2024