How To Break Your Leg, Make An Edit And Avoid Byron Bay Wookies
Ladies and gentleman, Joel Paxton!
Do you remember when the CT was in France?
And do you remember when La Graviere fired while the Quiksilver Pro was held in what was essentially Rio de Janeiro except with breasts fully exposed instead of just kind of exposed in the style of bikini that has become known as Brazilian?
And do you remember seeing clips of Joel Paxton surfing La Graviere and wondering just who, in the fuck, Joel Paxton is?
Folks, that is what surf journalism is for; using semicolons incorrectly and uncovering momentous truths. And so I tracked him down and figured out just who, in the fuck, Joel Paxton is.
As it turns out, Joel Paxton is a cripple. He broke his leg while in France — on the last clip of this edit, no less — and has been spending his time spending Bede Durbidge money on editing software that completely sucks!
Let’s find out more.
Stab: Who are you?
Joel: I’m Joel.
Where are you from?
I was born in Merewether but moved to Byron Bay when I was 8.
How old are you?
And who are you?
Why did you break your leg?
I don’t know. I had a good section and I just wanted to land that air.
What do broken legged people do?
Sit around the house. Drink beer. Lose my shit. I paid $60 for some weird program to edit this little clip. Felt like I’d learn something out of it, but it kind of sucked.
Does that make you more ethical than someone who spent $20 on a pirate version of Final Cut in Indonesia?
No, just stupider.
Where was this filmed?
France for a week and Sumbawa for a week.
Were there Israelis in Sumbawa?
I’m not sure, but there was a bunch of Euros. Is Isreal in Europe?
No, Asia. Were there Euros in France?
What do you do in Sumbawa when the waves suck?
Living in Byron, do you fornicate with wookies?
You try to stay away from the wookie ones.
All the time?
They’re there, if you’re looking. Now that it’s summer, it’s wookie season. They’ve migrated from Sydney and there’s been this crazy influx. Campervans and shitlocks all over the place.
You work at Mount Woodgee surfboards to help pay the bills. Have you ever touched one of Bede Durbidge’s boards?
Yeah, I mean, I guess so.
Have you ever touched Bede Durbidge?
I think I shook his hand.
I want to go to Hawaii once my knee is sweet. Then I want to save up and do a few trips next year and put out another edit or two.
Are you going to come back stronger like Mick Fanning in 2005?
What about like Shea Lopez?
I don’t really know who that is.
He tried a floater at Backdoor and his knee got all fucked up. Will you try a floater at Backdoor or are you a pussy compared to Shea Lopez?
I’ll let you know when I get there.
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