Watch: Colin Moran In OCTOPUS: COLIN MORAN! - Stab Mag

Live Now — Episode 3 Of Surf100 Challenge Series Presented By Pacifico

84 Views

Watch: Colin Moran In OCTOPUS: COLIN MORAN!

The sexiest grip company continues to lead the way in surf pornography that rips like a bat into hell! 

cinema // Apr 11, 2019
Words by Stab
Reading Time: < 1 minute

Did you know that the plural of octopus is not octopuses, nor octopi, but octopodes?

It isn’t. But it’s a common misconception among the type of person who likes to think they’re especially smart and trots out obscure facts to make themselves feel superior. I know, because I’m one of those people. I’ve been waving around that little bit of “look-how-smart-I-am” for years, like an ugly dog with a hunk of rotten garbage in his mouth.

I only learned I was wrong today, when I decided to double-check prior to scraping together a few words to accompany the above Colin ‘Goose’ Moran clip. Now I feel like an absolute fucking idiot. Burning with shame, filled with self-loathing, buoyed only by the fact that most people ignore the ridiculous nonsense that never ceases to dribble from my lips.

Just like you’re gonna ignore what I’ve written and only remember the video. It’s a top tier hunk of surf porn. Punk music, scary good surfing, juxtaposed with the fun little snippets that make all of Octopus’s videos enjoyable, even if they’ll probably get the brand in trouble one day.

To top it off, there’s not a single second of slo-mo palm trees waving in a tropical breeze.

I think I speak for us all when I say, “I’m really sick of that shit. I know it earned everyone a bunch of money back in 2005, but it’s way past time we move the fuck along and do something different.”

Comments

Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up

Advertisement

Most Recent

Surf100 Challenge Series Presented By Pacifico: Episode 3

"The tribe has spoken," Dane Reynolds pronounced, and a surfer's torch was snuffed.

Jul 3, 2025

When Surfer’s Eye Is Actually Cancer

Erin Campbell's brutal journey from surf camp dreams to chemo drops, cryotherapy, and surgical horror.

Jul 3, 2025

Surfing’s 2025 Q2 Report

An assessment of surfing's vital signs throughout the second quarter of 2025.

Jul 2, 2025

What Actually Happened to Occy’s Mad Max Plunger Pool In Yeppoon?

Surf Lakes’ brass talks: internet hecklers, the unplugging of the plunger, and the Tom Curren…

Jul 2, 2025

Poor Goofy Foots 

Data shows that the world is stacked against goofs — they even make 15% less money than…

Jul 1, 2025

Britain’s First Wavepool Has Closed — What Really Happened?

Bankruptcy, social media hackings, debts unpaid — and yet, reopening looms.

Jul 1, 2025

Watch: Was Matt Meola’s Air Actually Better Than Hughie’s?

Watch the full Swatch Nines highlight reel and decide.

Jun 30, 2025

Houshmand Bludgeons Field To Win Second CT — Molly Picklum Tastes Blood, Snatches World #1 In Brazil

You can't argue with big surfing — that's Saquarema wrapped.

Jun 29, 2025

37 Years Old And World #1 — What’s Changed For Jordy Smith?

On rediscovering decades old surfboard templates, having a personality on the CT, and why this…

Jun 27, 2025

Tom Lowe Stars in ‘Let Me Live’

The wild, improbable ascent of Britain’s best big-wave surfer.

Jun 27, 2025

Saq Wrap: Italo Celebrates Mid-Heat, Griff Drops A Freestyle, Jordy + Yago Continue BBQing 20-YOs

Top seeds sow ruin, Final 5 starts to crystallize.

Jun 27, 2025

Surf100 Challenge Series Presented By Pacifico: Episode 2

Our seven surviving surfers confront an oddly large California beach break.

Jun 26, 2025

SEOTY: The ‘Once-In-A-Decade’ Caribbean Swell That Kelly Slater Passed On

Michael Dunphy stars in Jimmicane's 'Blue Veil'

Jun 25, 2025

Who Owns Bingin? Legal Fight To Stop Demolition Begins

Eviction notices served for all businesses built on state land.

Jun 25, 2025

Tony Hawk Just Named Hughie Vaughan’s Internet-Breaking Air Because… No One Else Can

89% of our IG poll respondents claimed the 'stale fish flipper' was the best air…

Jun 25, 2025

German Surfers: AN INVESTIGATION

Truth is the light by which the world can see. 

Jun 24, 2025

“I Lost Everything I’ve Ever Owned, But This Board Came Back”

One month after the LA wildfires, a surfboard washed ashore.

Jun 24, 2025

Shock Therapy: World 1 & 2 Eliminated Early In Saquarema

Gabriela Bryan and Caity Simmers fall victim on Day 1 of the Vivo Rio Pro.

Jun 22, 2025
Advertisement