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We promise this won't (really) hurt.

Wanna win a new surfboard? We have a custom Chilli ‘Black Vulture’ to gift (plus all the trim you’d expect from a premium dealer). To be in the running, just answer a few questions for us. It won’t take long.

Mikey Wright And Jesse Mendes Are Fine, But The Internet Isn't

Yesterday morning, Jesse Mendes dropped in on Mikey Wright on what turned out to be a corker of North Point bomb. Typically, the person responsible for a drop in would be the one receiving a carpark spray, but in this case the offender, Jesse Mendes, approached the man he'd recently squandered and decided an on land retaliation was in order.

According to Jake 'Snake' Patterson's original IG post, Mikey had just caught a set wave a few minutes prior to the drop in wave in question while Jesse had been waiting for hours for a wave. Jesse therefore decided enough was enough when the mulletlord wildcard decided to sneak deeper into the lineup to grab another bomb. 

In short, Jesse approached Mikey, they had a borderline aggressive tussle, and it never escalated beyond a glorified catfight as the two gave a few pushes, board hits, and presumably a few less than pleasant words were exchanged. 

Today, after Mikey's heat, footage has been released of the two boys putting aside their pride and differences to make good over what was "never intended to be a big deal". Both of the gents pushed through their Round 2 heats today and might possibly even face one another in a heat later this event – although it's unlikely. 

Unfortunately and unsurprisingly, there was a larger issue on the social media and internet front than there ever was between Mikey and Jesse. Tempers flare and shortly simmer in the real world, whereas non-existent egos rise and hide behind their keys in the age of the internet.

Snake's original Instagram post was pulled from his page, @snaketales, as the typical commentary descended from what were lighthearted arguments, to personal attacks and eventually to death threats towards both Mikey and Jesse. 

It's quite interesting how much knowledge of the incident people can garner from a sub-minute clip from the other side of the world on a handheld device; nevertheless all social channels were ablaze with uninformed and often obscenely derogatory commentary on the brief confrontation between the two Quiksilver teammates. 

Hundreds flocked from Snake's original post when it was pulled and landed directly into Mikey's latest IG upload. 

Here's an installment of some of the worst - (sic) for the following clusterfuck of grammatical errors:

@Brazilian_samurai_mma – What's up lil bitch @mikeywright1? Make sure you walk with body guard from now one specifically on the North shore I gonna be looking for you!! Let's see now if you really a tuff guys, you fuck !!!!!

@bruno_noveas – Come over to Brazil bitch us nigga

@wes_chaney – Good on ya Mikey, should've sent that kooky bastard back to brasil in a ambulance. 

@solanohb – If you come to Brazil youre dead. (A personal favourite of mine!)

@f_ramiresx – @mikeyright1 come to Brazil. We are waiting for you to drown. In itauna you do not surf. 

@harrybryant – Bring back the fucken biff!!

But it wasn't only Jesse's Brazillian supporters who were lighting up online. There was a fair share of Australian pro-mullet and pro-localism patriots barracking back at Jesse on his latest post:

@scentofthearth Go back to the favelas boy

@cameron_shelton Your a disgrace...can't even respect the locals when your in their country

@quinn_sponger Mikey Wright would stomp your ass and ruin your career.

@wbmitch Kook in and out of the Water Shit surfing to back it up I bet no round 4 appearance all yeR lil BITch (Insightful!)

and lastly, we have @tommyburraston with an eloquently put jab at Jesse with a simply put, "fuckwit". 

Snake's explanatory post for removing the initial video was also poorly received from the majority of the keyboard hammering contingent. Most of which can be summarised by Jeremy Flores' comment, "pussy" – usually Jezz is known for blowing his lid post heat, but apparently the removal of this altercation had him equally as eggy. 

The only shred of rationality in the form of IG philosophy was courtesy of Tom Carroll who summarised the situation as follows:

"Humans. A wave breaks, we try on ownership of an imagined kind, a few moments go by, the wave disappears into the shore, we are left behaving...one elongated Seinfeld episode ensues."

Now Tom might not be ready to take on Descartes just yet, but in contrast to the abundance of barely literate musings being served online right now, his take on the situation is a breath of fresh air. 

The opinions don't end at Instagram either, Stab's Facebook post is littered with the same types of slurs, as is every other outlet who has re-shared or made comment on the video.

Of course, the lambasted labyrinth that is Disqus has been running hot since the incident dropped. And surprisingly, in contrast to the death threats and racial slurs found on Instagram, the Disqus commentary was a little lighter with a splash of wit thrown in the mix.

For example: Mark – Two bombs don't make a Wright. 

As well as an overload of more one sided comments in which I won't be repeating, but you know where you can find them – here. 

Whilst it would've been a bit of entertainment if Jesse and Mikey really 'brought back the biff', the both of them are probably thankful nothing escalated beyond the above; it's safe to assume the WSL wouldn't handle the situation as forgivingly as Mikey did.

We've all been snaked before, we've all dropped in on someone and I'm sure every single one of you has let your temper out of it's cage once or twice. It's unusual to see the offender light up the victim as Jesse did, but it certainly isn't the first time someone's frustrations piqued after sitting on their board aimlessly in a jam-packed lineup.  

This type of shit is littered throughout lineups all over the world each and every day – it shouldn't be resulting in death threats and absurd comments from people who likely don't know either of the two surfers or the backstory. 

A little bit of heated discussion is expected, perhaps even a few nationalistic back and forths between who would've won out of the Brazilian and Aussie, but threatening someone's life, or hoping they drown – despite the lack of serious intent – is stupid and immature to say the least. 

Unfortunately, that's the modern age and internet living...

Then again, I gained a job thanks to an internet comment section, so perhaps I shouldn't be so harsh on what is likely just a bunch of unemployed prospective journalists! 

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