Watch: Caity Simmers On A Machado-Shaped Board Built From Punched-Out Ciggies

Though it’s said that smoking will chew your lungs into Swiss cheese, blacken your teeth, rot your nails, and steal whatever years you’ve got left, Kelly Slater—a man living through the punchline of a joke he won’t explain—tried it once. And look at him now: still standing, still smirking, still (kind of) working.

If you’re gonna punch something, you might as well make it a durrie. But when it’s done burning you down, toss it like you mean it. It’s 2024. Put the damn thing in a bin. 

Still not convinced? Here’s what Caity Simmers has to say about litterbugs: “They just flick it, thinking it won’t matter. But if everyone thinks that, it’s going to make a difference. People who live around the ocean have more responsibility—they use it, so they should take care of it.”

Be like Caity.

Three years back, Caity teamed up with The Cigarette Surfboard—an organisation run by our friend Ben Judkins and Taylor Lane—to film an edit with her brother Timo. In the clip above, the newest World Champ’s riding a ciggie quad shaped by Rob Machado, built for someone of his size and weight. At 5’1″ now, and likely smaller at 15, she has no trouble flinging her dart-based torpedo around the lineup. For comparison, here’s a fully grown Noah Waggy handling a ciggie craft with similar dims.

Aside from being a world champ, an Olympian, and a role model for young girls in Oceanside, Caity still makes time for some environmental work, dragging herself to the beach for the occasional cleanup. “A quarter of what we pick up is cigarette butts,” says Caity, disapprovingly. 

The environmental movement is starving for a new hero. Why the hell shouldn’t it be Caity Simmers?