6th Biggest Surf Instagram Enters Seltzer Game - Stab Mag
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Mmm... Fizz in my mouth

6th Biggest Surf Instagram Enters Seltzer Game

KookSlams swings into booze.

Words by Ethan Davis

Low calorie surf content needs a low calorie seltzer.

As you and I both know, KookSlams is the best surf meme account in the world. Their tone and wit is insanely clever and their reach surpasses core surf enthusiasts such as ourselves. I was surprised to find that all four of my family members (non-surfers) were active followers. 

With an Instagram following of 1.6M followers, they have arrested the attention of the sixth-largest audience in surfing, only trailing Gabriel Medina (8.7M), WSL (3.7M), Bethany Hamilton (2.1M), Kelly Slater (2.7M) and Alana Blanchard (1.8M).

The difficult thing about Instagram, however, is that it’s hard to sell something when you’re just a fantastic aggregator of content with cute captions. 

Other than the small shelf of merch they commodify (e.g. hats, tees etc), KookSlams doesn’t actually create anything that can be exchanged for currency. This is why impressive followings on social media are a vanity metric. Impressive by social standards, not in terms of cash-value.

Platforms such as YouTube, Patreon, and Only Fans that offer dollar rewards for high-value content aren’t available to aggregators, which might help explain why KookSlams has ventured into Seltzerland. 

KookSlams follows in the footsteps of other surfers in the seltzer space such as Fizz started by Paul Fisher, Ashland Hard Seltzer with involvement from Jack Freestone and Alana Blanchard, and Tolago Hard Seltzer co-owned by Ian Crane, Griffin Colapinto, Curren Caples, Noah Wegrich, Luke Davis and Mitch Coleborn. 

I’m 23 and am apparently the target market of this new drink. I have consumed two seltzers in my life. Given the static TV taste, that’s the end for me. 

Should we be anticipating a slam? Only time will tell.

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