6th Biggest Surf Instagram Enters Seltzer Game - Stab Mag

Dakoda Walters wins Surf100 presented by Pacifico.

937 Views
Mmm... Fizz in my mouth

6th Biggest Surf Instagram Enters Seltzer Game

KookSlams swings into booze.

elsewhere // Jul 21, 2021
Words by Ethan Davis
Reading Time: < 1 minute

Low calorie surf content needs a low calorie seltzer.

As you and I both know, KookSlams is the best surf meme account in the world. Their tone and wit is insanely clever and their reach surpasses core surf enthusiasts such as ourselves. I was surprised to find that all four of my family members (non-surfers) were active followers. 

With an Instagram following of 1.6M followers, they have arrested the attention of the sixth-largest audience in surfing, only trailing Gabriel Medina (8.7M), WSL (3.7M), Bethany Hamilton (2.1M), Kelly Slater (2.7M) and Alana Blanchard (1.8M).

The difficult thing about Instagram, however, is that it’s hard to sell something when you’re just a fantastic aggregator of content with cute captions. 

Other than the small shelf of merch they commodify (e.g. hats, tees etc), KookSlams doesn’t actually create anything that can be exchanged for currency. This is why impressive followings on social media are a vanity metric. Impressive by social standards, not in terms of cash-value.

Platforms such as YouTube, Patreon, and Only Fans that offer dollar rewards for high-value content aren’t available to aggregators, which might help explain why KookSlams has ventured into Seltzerland. 

KookSlams follows in the footsteps of other surfers in the seltzer space such as Fizz started by Paul Fisher, Ashland Hard Seltzer with involvement from Jack Freestone and Alana Blanchard, and Tolago Hard Seltzer co-owned by Ian Crane, Griffin Colapinto, Curren Caples, Noah Wegrich, Luke Davis and Mitch Coleborn. 

I’m 23 and am apparently the target market of this new drink. I have consumed two seltzers in my life. Given the static TV taste, that’s the end for me. 

Should we be anticipating a slam? Only time will tell.

Comments

Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up

Advertisement

Most Recent

Joel Parkinson Enters The Confessional | StabMic Ep. 31

“I’m not sure if I’m allowed to tell this story… But I’m gonna do it…

Sep 14, 2026

Julian Wilson Vs Shopify

Rivvia Project's founder on office life, stretching the dollar and their latest team edit.

Sep 14, 2026

The Poor Get Poorer: Does The WSL’s Format Conspire Against Its Losers?

+ How Oscar popped his Berry.

Sep 13, 2026

Surf100 Winner Now Wealthy Enough To Think About Interest Rates

Dakoda Walters enters the next phase of adulthood, while 2500 Pacificos get drained at pace.

Sep 11, 2026

Yago Dora Is Undefeated At Lowers — Does That End This Week?

The cut is here, the bubble is stacked, and one Aussie is two L's away…

Sep 10, 2026

The 2026 $100k Surf100 Finale, Presented By Pacifico

Parko, Noa, Dakoda and Dimitri face off in our audience judged, 100-minute surf exhibition.

Sep 9, 2026

Can Parko Beat The Kids For $100k?

Watch our Surf100 warm-ups.

Sep 8, 2026

Nathan Florence On Why The 10,000 Hour Rule Does Not Apply To Surfing

And how tubes cost him $12,000 per minute.

Sep 8, 2026

How To Watch (& Judge) The $100,000 Surf100 Finale

Everything you need to know before September 9 (PST).

Sep 7, 2026

Go To Lakey Peak For Two Weeks, Accidentally Leave With SEOTY Entry

Watch a dozen or so A+ airs in Makana Franzmann's 'Off Axis.'

Sep 5, 2026

How Zeke Lau Became Surfing’s Villain | StabMic Ep. 30

“Am I happy with the way things played out? Not really.”

Sep 5, 2026

How Will This Weekend’s Hurricane Marie Stack Up Against 2014’s?

We asked Surfline's senior forecaster to discern fact from lineup chatter.

Sep 4, 2026

And Our $12k Kandui Resort Giveaway Winner Is…

Hosing down wildfires in Big Sur.

Sep 3, 2026

Watch: Two Underdogs, One Very Expensive Bone

Dakoda and Dimitri’s thoughts on facing Parko and Noa for a $100K payday.

Sep 3, 2026

Cloudbreak Saves Goofs From Challenger Series Horrors

Cole Houshmand and Erin 'Don't-Call-It-A-Title-Run' Brooks win in Fiji.

Sep 3, 2026

Karma Just Sent Kauli Vaast A Lump Sum

Perfect 10s, ankle sprains, and a rising swell in Fiji

Sep 2, 2026

Watch: EAST Starring Harry Bryant, Episode Two

This is not a fin test.

Sep 1, 2026

Fiji Lately: World Champs Out, Bar Tabs Up, Swell Inbound

Eight heats in 96 hours; or the glorious doldrums of Tavarua laydays. 

Aug 31, 2026
Advertisement