“I Want To See The Winner Get Stretchered Off The Beach With A $5K Check” - Stab Mag
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Spoiler: Soft hands do not win // Photos by Andrew Shield

“I Want To See The Winner Get Stretchered Off The Beach With A $5K Check”

Julian & Co. invite a 20 year-old carpenter to Stab High, courtesy of Bum Rush

cinema // Sep 9, 2025
Words by Coral McDuffee
Reading Time: 2 minutes

Bum Rush arrived in Merewhether the day before an annual Australian ritual called Two-Up.

The game smells like desperation and wet paper. Tastes like stale beer. Looks like narrowed pupils. And sounds like: CoME On SpInNer. In remembrance of soldiers, the Australians confront their own mortality, which makes the bets higher and the noise bearable — even lovable. Except for one mouth-spitter.

Built by convicts sent to work the coal ports in the 1800s, the ‘Lady’ sits on the town’s most desirable right-hander… and directly in front of a beach hotel that rages on Anzac Day.

Ahhh the perils of the journey.

The 13th installment of the Bum Rush Tour carried a similar tenacity to Two-Up without the surplus saliva. After a hands-on condition assessment, our qualified panel — Milla Coco Brown, Caden Francis, Hughie Vaughan, and Julian Wilson — decided the river raging in front of Ladypools spelled out one thing only: RAMPS.

Like the running of the bulls with fewer pileups.


“I want to see the winner stretchered off the beach with a $5K check,” Julian commanded. With the flash of Hughie’s Vaughen’s Stab High ticket, all of Newcastle ascended Merewhether’s lineup, throwing flesh, fiberglass, and any thoughts of self-preservation into the wind.

Jacko Baker’s water displacement deserves a notable mention.

The headlines include: 

  • Hughie almost gets hustled out of $5k by Jacko Baker
  • If you’re feeling low, Milla Coco Brown is who you need in your corner
  • One surfer breaks a fin, continues rotating to the flats (a la Eli Hanneman
  • The same surfer destroys his ankle, still continues to rotate (a la Kerri Strug
  • Judges send Bum Rush Winner back out to complete a “Stab High Worthy” air before handing over a golden ticket. 
Can you taste the glory? See you at Stab High, Dom.

After one collision, three hours of surfing, and over 30 flight attempts, Dom Thomas stomped a massive full rote and snagged a soggy ticket to Stab High. We’re looking forward to seeing how the 20-year-old’s unrelenting spirit translates to a wavepool. 

Click here for everything you need to know about Stab High Sydney 2025, Presented by Monster Energy — a surf contest focused on flight.

Buy tickets to Stab High Sydney on October 10 + 11 here

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