Stab Magazine | "I'm Just As Dumb As I Am Smart, Like A Wave"

Now Unlocked: Chippa Wilson Stars In "Zipper"

3 Views

“I’m Just As Dumb As I Am Smart, Like A Wave”

Edition 109.

style // Nov 11, 2017
Words by stab
Reading Time: 3 minutes

Another week has come and gone and what have we to show for it? More gray hairs? A dollar? Two dollars? That weird fungal thing, again? Well it’s time to put all of that behind us and settle in for a laugh. If life is pointless, why not get our kicks in when we can?

No group embraces that sentiment more acutely than Stab’s demented (and unintended) offspring, the commentariat — an amalgamation of people old and young who, for one reason or another, can’t think of anything more fun than hurling ego-bombs at aquatic gypsies and scribes.

Yet somehow, I don’t know what we’d do without you.

Normally, co-leader of your ragtag pack, Mr. iHusky, would use this forum to display his weekly wit assessment. This week, however, Husk’s backyard was infiltrated by squirrels and he’s spent the past few days barking uselessly up a tree, leaving the notoriously unfunny StabStaff to pick this week’s COTW.

So, did you get a gold star, or will you be forced to ride the commentary short bus with Stu Azole?

Scroll and learn!

 

 

9. Team Chilli Vs. Indo’s Trampoline Reef

301

 

 

8. Kai Lenny Peer Pressures John Florence (And Others) Into A Serious Foiling Problem

302

7. How Kelly’s Wave Works

303

6. Meet The Winner of All 12 Stab In The Dark Boards

304

5. A Two-Minute Clip From Backdoor Last Tuesday

305

4. A Wellness Retreat… On A Surf Charter In The Mentawais?

306

3. Surfing #Vanlife Family Escape From Amazon River Pirates

307

2. Noa Deane In ‘Candle’

1

1. Come to Oregon, Get Choked Out?

308

Comments

Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up

Advertisement

Most Recent

A Shallow Dive Into The Psychology Of The World’s Heaviest Rock Jumps

Between a rock and a bunch of dry people laughing.

May 3, 2024

2 Australian Surfers, 1 American Still Missing In Baja California, Mexico

Three suspects have been arrested, a truck was found burned, but the friends remain "missing".

May 2, 2024

Zipper Offcut: A Pacific Island Micro-Wedge

Chippa, Harry, Dion, a hazardous ramp, and a near fiberglass-vasectomy.

May 2, 2024

UNLOCKED: Chippa Wilson Stars In ‘Zipper’ — A Surf Film By Stab & Monster

Featuring Filipe Toledo, Harry Bryant, Bobby Martinez, Eithan Osborne, Taro Watanabe, and Dion Agius.

May 2, 2024

Is Nat Young’s 4.03 A Symbol Of Surf Judging Demise, Or A Harmless Scoring Aberration?

World champs, super coaches, WSL commentators and more sound off on the state of surf…

May 1, 2024

How Stretch And Nathan Fletcher SpaceX’d Surfboard Design Into The Future

“I brought the boards to Hawaii and everybody laughed at me. Everyone except Michael Ho…

Apr 30, 2024

Doug Silva Is The Skullet-Locked 12x World Party Champ Working Wonders For Seth Moniz’s Tour Trajectory

Here's how he uses EDM + storytelling to snap talent into 'infected alligators'.

Apr 30, 2024

Marti Paradisis On The New Shipsterns Safety Initiative + The Laziness Of Bandwagoning Swell Carnivals

Before calling Shipsterns Bluff and getting flexed, read this. 

Apr 28, 2024

Full Frame: A 15-Minute, One-Wave Pipe Session

"Oh shit, that was kind of nuts, I think I think I'm just gonna go…

Apr 27, 2024

Want Half-A-Brain? Keep Calling Helmets Lame

Kai Lenny surfs hideous Jaws + Mavs + Waimea, joins esteemed list of surfers to…

Apr 27, 2024

80 Men And 48 Women Enter The CS Gauntlet — Only 15 Will Survive

Your 2024 Challenger Series x Gold Coast Pro preview.

Apr 26, 2024

The Best Surfing I’ve Ever Seen: Nate Lawrence

Kolohe, Cola Bros, Luke Davis, Crane, and "the most magical 3 weeks ever had in…

Apr 25, 2024

Snapper To Return To The CT In 2025(!) + WSL Announces Season Wildcards

Next year is looking up. Here's what we know...

Apr 25, 2024

Kelly Slater Will Surf In Tahiti And Fiji CT Events — And He’s Bringing A Secret Weapon With Him

What's it like to coach an 11x champ? We asked Glenn "Micro" Hall.

Apr 24, 2024

Watch: A Masterclass In Belated Drops At The Teepee Capital Of The World

And the rest of the O’Neill team sticks the landing in Hawaii.

Apr 24, 2024

How Sophie McCulloch Broke Her Back At The Box Three Days After Being Cut From The CT

The untold brutal side story of finals day in WA.

Apr 24, 2024

The Cut Wasn’t The Surf Fans’ Idea — But It Might Be Our Fault

Psychoanalyzing surfing’s highly sadistic audience (us!).

Apr 23, 2024

How Surfers (And Skiers/Snowboarders) Could Be Using Buoys Better

Snow in Japan = waves at Pipe = snow in Utah, @PowderBuoy told us.

Apr 22, 2024
Advertisement