Stab Magazine | The 10 most quotable surf movies of all time
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The 10 most quotable surf movies of all time

Words by Jake Howard In celebration of the release of the new Point Break trailer and the inevitable (and much anticipated) addition of more cheeky lines to our already cheesy, overly clichéd lexicon, we offer you a run through of some of wave riding’s most quotable films. North Shore: Turtle’s AdviceThe gold standard for which […]

style // Mar 8, 2016
Words by stab
Reading Time: 3 minutes

Words by Jake Howard

In celebration of the release of the new Point Break trailer and the inevitable (and much anticipated) addition of more cheeky lines to our already cheesy, overly clichéd lexicon, we offer you a run through of some of wave riding’s most quotable films.

North Shore: Turtle’s Advice
The gold standard for which all other surf movie lines shall be judged: “When the wave breaks here, don’t be there.” Ever since Turtle broke it down to Rick Kane the sentiment has been repeated after every flogging from Pipe to Periscopes, Sunset to Swamis.

Kelly Slater Black and White:
“It’s the morning of the final.” And like that, Kelly Slater became a god.

Fair Bits: Ben Stiller’s Angry
Ben Stiller and toadie Donavon Frankenreiter skewing surf stars is Oscar worthy. “The Malloy brothers? More like the fuckin’ Marx brothers.” We couldn’t have said it better ourselves.

Point Break (original)
“Point Break” is so full of zingers it’s hard to distill it down to one gem, but “I’m so hungry I could eat the ass end of a dead rhino,” does a pretty good job. Gary Busey, Patrick Swayze, Keanu Reeves, the remake sure better be something special.

Drive Thru Caribbean
Surfing’s version of the reality show, the Drive Thru series proved that surf stars just wanna have fun. Traversing Australia, Europe, Central and South America, like Jamaican jerk chicken, Drive Thru Caribbean is especially spicy. Watch sweet, skipping Pat O’Connell get a little salty at an airline worker while Yadin looks into the camera and mumbles. “I’m gonna just bend over and start lubing my bum up.” You just don’t get that kind of candor from the Brazilian Storm.

Endless Summer
Bruce Brown wrote the book on dry, ironic surf narration. The commentary that accompanies 1964’s Endless Summer is both witty and a sign of the times. Surfing in Senegal for the first time, of the locals he notes, “Being good Africans, they threw a few rocks.” A little later on in Tahiti he picks on a poor fat kid named Irving…“he has the shiniest skin on the block.” Classy Bruce, real classy.

Mad Wax
“Is it 20 or 40 mils? I can’t remember,” says Ross Clarke Jones with no hint of irony whatsoever. Mad Wax, a quirky, sci-fi thriller starring RCJ, Tom Carroll, Gary Elkerton, Richard Cram, Marvin Foster and others, is the timeless tale of a young, blue-collar gremlin (RCJ) that stumbles onto a book on how to make your own surfboard wax. Because he’s no scientist, he invents a way to magically transport people to any surf spot in the world. Madness ensues.

In God’s Hands
Shane Dorian, Matty Liu and Matt George running shirtless around sweaty Indo, what could be weird about that? Given Matt’s flair for the dramatic, it’s almost not fair putting this movie—which has seemingly been buried by the sands of time—on this list. “There’s a wave out there, it’s going to be massive, and all I can think about doing is riding it,” remark’s Shane’s character. If only Shane’s character had a chance to meet the real Shane.

Psychedelic Desert Groove: Billabong Challenge w/ Occy at Gnarloo
Picture if you will, Occy lost in the desert. Gordo the Great rocks up in a dune buggy, screams, “Where ya headed, mate?” Politely, Occy replies, “The Challenge.” And Gordo, bless the man’s sweet heart, hollers, “I love a challenge, get in!!!” And like that they’re off to Gnarloo, off to spawn the concept of the Dream Tour. If you’ve missed this one, you really should give it a watch.

Searching For Tom Curren
Because ol’ Tommy doesn’t say much, the lines he shares in Searching For Tom Curren resonate. They’re like Zen Buddhist instructions. Like fortune cookies. “It’s not that hard, it’s like riding a bike or something.” Of course it is Tom, of course it is…tell me more.

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