Watch: A Sandbar Shuffle with John John And The Goat

Fresh off a Pipe Masters victory, John John Florence celebrated his victory by ravaging a North Shore sandbar, alongside his pal and potential father, Kelly Slater. This is some serious alpha male content. No baby turns, no half-rotations, and no intention of laying off the gas pedal—just two wolves in a lineup full of Shih Tzus (or as Sunny would say, two lions in a lineup full of kittens). 

While it may have been a freesurf, Florence won the heat with his massive air reverse. I think his fins scraped the Goodyear blimp on the way down.

And what? Do you want to tell me it’s not a competition? Of course, it is. This is John John and Kelly we’re talking about, two of the world’s fiercest competitive surfers. For them, everything is a competition. Considering Kelly’s inability to age physically, this rivalry will likely conclude on a North Shore nursing home’s shuffleboard court.