Dylan Graves Decimates The Gold Coast’s $39 Million Wave

Cyclone Alfred gifted waves and stole sand. Four million cubic metres of grit shuffled offshore, the berm shrank, and the high-tide mark ebbed dangerously close to the shrubbery that keeps it off the streets.

In calm conditions, the rehabilitation process happens naturally. The sand eventually works its way back to shore from its underwater pile. But the Gold Coast, aka God’s Country, fortunately has omnipotent powers (and budget) to speed things up with a flotilla of giant dredge boats. And Mayor Tom Tate wasted no time allocating $39 million in taxpayer money to spray it back where it belonged. Beneath the scantily-clad bundas of OnlyFans influencers and Fisher fanboys.

Related: Maybe he should have just sprung for three of these $13 million setups instead?

What was less predictable was how it landed.

Out of the cannons it sprayed, forming into a neat series of novelty sandbars straight out of a surfer’s notebook. Right out the front of Surfers Paradise — a bit of a misnomer, given the waves are usually shit — A-frames, mini tubes, and peaky little sections began stacking into existence. The kind Dyl Graves documents and decimates in equal measure.

Disqustingly good. Btw, the banks are gone.