The Hog Makes His Olympic Predictions - Stab Mag
3877 Views

The Hog Makes His Olympic Predictions

After a night spent vigorously cross-examining athlete data, Hedgy produced these BOAG picks.

news // Jul 25, 2024
Words by Ethan Davis
Reading Time: 2 minutes

Place your bets over at Betonline.AG

It has long been rumored that when the Hog focuses his blue lazers on a concentrated spot, they are capable of melting three inch thick steel beams.

This is self-evident to those who experienced the 2022 Tahiti Pro, where he hamstrung Jack Robinson and Filipe Toledo’s chances of clinching carved Polynesia driftwood and a $100K pay cheque, as a 43-year-old event wildcard.

Alarmingly, he’s now turned his high-beams to Excel spreadsheets, in the service of predicting which surfers will win Olympic hardware in Teahupo’o.

With absolutely zero conflict of interest to declare (other than working at Surfing Australia as a High Performance surf coach), here they all are. 

Mens: John Florence, Jack Robinson, Gabriel Medina, Kauli Vaast.
Darkhorse: Ethan Ewing

Womens: Tyler Wright, Vahine Fierro, Tatiana Weston-Webb.
Darkhorse: Molly Picklum

Just remember: Tom Whitaker and Andy Irons both earned decent scores going right in Tahiti. Photo by Ed Sloane/World Surf League

Mikey C’s below

Event winner
$50 on Kauli Vaast at +700 to win $350
$10 on Ramzi B at +2500 to win $250
$10 on Joao Chianca at +2500 ti win $250
$10 on Connor O’Leary at +4000 to win $400
$5 on Alan Cleland at +10000 to win $500
$5 on Matty McGillivray at +6600 to win $330
$50 on Carissa Moore at +1000 to win $500
$50 on Molly Picklum at +750 win $375

Men’s R1

$5 on Tim Elter at +1600 to win $80
$20 on Matty McG at +750 to win $150
$50 on Alonso Correa at +850 to win $425
$20 on Connor O’Leary at +375 to win $75
$5 on Billy Stairmand at +1600 to win $80
$10 on Alan Cleland at +950 to win $95
$50 on Kauli Vaast at -105 to win
$5 on Andy Criere at +1600 to win $80
$5 on Lucca Mesinas at +850 to win $43
$50 on Leo Fioravanti at -170 to win $29
$5 on Reo Inaba at +1600 to win $80

Women’s R1

$5 on Anat Leilor at +1200 to win $60
$5 on Santa D-O at +1200 to win $60
$5 on Candelaria at +1600 to win $80

Place your bets over at Betonline.AG

Comments

Comments are a Stab Premium feature. Gotta join to talk shop.

Already a member? Sign In

Want to join? Sign Up

Advertisement

Most Recent

Does Cloudbreak Have An Irukandji Problem?

“I'm lying in the boat convulsing going, ‘Fuck Dad, am I going to die?’” recalled…

Apr 20, 2026

The Hierarchy Holds Firm

Usual suspects progress in victory-at-sea conditions at Margs.

Apr 19, 2026

The Sport Of Short (And Muscular) Kings?

Is there an ideal body type for surfing? 

Apr 19, 2026

Is Surfing For The Rich? | StabMic Episode 10

Nate Fletcher & Dane Reynolds discuss the state of modern surfing.

Apr 17, 2026

Surfing’s Obsession With Proof

A photographer's musings on the enduring impact of surf imagery and our connection to it.

Apr 16, 2026

The Longest Day In WSL History Almost Ends In A Brawl

Twenty-eight heats and a non-interference call that spills out into the carpark.

Apr 16, 2026

Do Second Impressions Ever Last?

A preview of the Margaret River Pro, 2026.

Apr 15, 2026

SEOTY: Josh Burke Stars In ‘Real Estate’

Why we should pay more attention to the Caribbean.

Apr 13, 2026

Gabriela Bryan And Miguel Pupo Ding The ‘Pop

And the reigning world champs get knocked down a peg.

Apr 11, 2026

Have High-Performance Surfboards Already Peaked? | StabMic Episode 09

Britt Merrick + Dane Reynolds on Medina’s CI stint, Slater, Ewing, and the ceiling of…

Apr 10, 2026

A Day In The Life Of A Surf Shop  

One solar day in the strange, sacred, wax-scented world of the surf shop.

Apr 9, 2026

How Do You Score An Impossible Air?

Italo v Gab was the title fight, but the rest of Day 5 delivered as…

Apr 9, 2026

Fourteen Heats, One Questionable Interference, And A Few Steps Closer To Tinnitus

Rip Curl Pro Bells: How is this Day 4 already?

Apr 8, 2026

Watch: Episode 01 of Stab in the Dark starring Ethan Ewing

The reigning champ vs 3x SITD winner vs an Indonesian-based wildcard.

Apr 7, 2026

Stab High x Monster Energy Is Coming To Virginia Beach, USA

Premium members get first access to tickets.

Apr 6, 2026

Griff Goes Futuristic To Beat The New Kid

The greatest wildcard loss in WSL history?

Apr 5, 2026

Watch: The Kelly Files, Vol. 3

"I'll surf until I die."

Apr 5, 2026

Mongrels Prevail In The Slop

A day of upsets, triumphant rookies, and solid showings from just a couple of returning…

Apr 4, 2026
Advertisement