Stab Magazine | Rory's Rumblings In Pe'ahi: "Half Excited, Half Terrified"
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Rory’s Rumblings In Pe’ahi: “Half Excited, Half Terrified”

Naked American shame, bouncing screaming and enjoying the day. 

news // Oct 28, 2017
Words by stab
Reading Time: 2 minutes

I am not the sharpest tack before the sun rises. Which explains why I left my room naked this morning on the way to the shared bathroom down the hall. I’m, obviously, not at home. My own bed is much larger and far more comfortable. But all cylinders were failing to fire and a nude jaunt toward the toilet made perfect sense.

The hissed exclamation of surprise from whichever of my fellow guests was privileged enough to bear witness snapped me out of it, sent me scurrying back to find something to cover my sin.

IMG 6287

Two tiny beds for one big man sporting a blue floral button up.

Perhaps I shouldn’t have bothered. Everyone but me is some form of European, untrammeled by my own American sense of shame. Evidenced by the various lovelies strolling about in various states of undress on their ways to and from the showers. I tell myself, “Look, don’t leer.” I don’t know how well I pull it off.

Today’s plan, should the contest run, was to file a few stories over the course of the day. Plans change. It seems I’ve found a spot on the WSL media boat, thanks to Dave Prodan and Chloe Kojima. I’m half excited, half terrified. A smallish boat in twenty-foot seas is not something with which I’m familiar. Hopefully I’ll comport myself well. 

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“Media boat left early, but I caught I ride out.”

So it’s the Kahului Harbor at 8:30. Wait to see if it goes. If so, I’m boat-bound for the day. Bouncing and screaming and enjoying the ride.

Or it’s back to the command center and find a way to kill the day. I’m sure there’s some work to be done. Dig through the phone numbers on hand and make a nuisance of myself. Ashton says that Billy Kemper is down to chat. It’d be pretty rad to pick the brain of the guy going for a three-peat.

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