The Craziest Surf Comp In The World Might Run Monday!

Ever get a late night (10pm-ish on Kauai) message from your boss and get stuck between “I’m a team player,” and “I’m way too fucked up right now and I want to help but this is kind of your fault for trusting me with this responsibility and, besides, do you know what fucking time it is.”?

Now imagine you’ve taken a couple large doses of LSD.

What do you do?

I mean, hell, the Cape Fear comps are fucking sick. I hate professional surfing more with every passing day, and I’m still amped like a kid to see that event run…

And though I know I’m probably not in the mental state to write this piece, here’s what you need to know: We’ll get to see Mick Fanning charge fucking Shipsterns, in spite of, not because of, the WSL.

It almost makes a person wonder if the sanctioning fees aren’t meant to suck the life out of exciting surfing in exchange for a quick buck, but no one really cares ‘cuz they don’t surf and they’ll be out in two years, max, anyway.

But that can’t be the case! Even if it is, it’s above my pay grade. I’m just a simple minded drug user tapping a keyboard because his boss is busy playing a TV star somewhere in the South Pacific, or wherever the fuck he is right now.

So this Monday, at one of the craziest slabs on the planet, the most memorable event of the last few years will run again. Do you remember the last Cape Fear event? Russel Bierke won, the carnage was absolutely next level, and at a point where from the outside it looked like Red Bull and the WSL were arch rivals, the entire WCT were glued to TV screens, drinking heavily at the bar on Nomotu and Tavarua, screaming their heads off at what was going on at Ours, disregarding the WSL’s requests to turn the channel, please. 

Are you excited!?