Are The QS And The General Public At War?

Ed note: the following is the third installment of our new weekly email chain called the Stab Fwd. If you’re into it, subscribe here. 

Also, this was written prior to the WSL’s event cancellation announcement.

Typically, when the QS and the general public converge, nothing spectacular occurs. There may be waves shared, a few big-ish evenings, some terribly confused people asking for autographs and selfies with whoever is ranked 147th (currently Sandon Whittaker), etc. In rare but notorious instances, the union of warm bodies in the night may lead to an illegitimate child being born with a slightly above average degree of athleticism and a genetic disposition to wearing a trucker hat. 

A grind, to be sure. 

However, things haven’t been so simple at the Sydney Pro. First, we saw a man with questionable board selection (you trying to trim in those waves there Torren Jr?) take off behind competitor Charly Quivront and try to shove him. Then we saw Griffin Colapinto do a little finner-to-Sterling-Spencer-out onto a fella. You can get mad at one and upset with the other or just find hilarity in both. Up to you. 

At any rate, there are still a few rounds of the competition left so there’s no telling what’s to come. My guess is that we’ll be left with an army of bastard love children. 

Our stories on these incidents — here and here — became two of this week’s most-clicked, for obvious reasons. Now here are two more: 

Meet The Wave That Jack Robinson Called “Like The Right And The Box Mixed Together”

Do you remember surf magazines? They were devices that people would sell by staining pieces of paper with information and gluing them all together. They died like 10 years ago, but they were cool. Surf mags would often whirl you through the details of a trip solely through photography and written word. There was a little bit of magic in that process that edits —  with all of their vulnerability to trends and reliance on interviews from people who are bad at being interviewed — seem to have lost. Anyway, this story feels like a throwback to those days and a lot of people clicked it because it is great.  

Breaking: Palm Springs’ First Official Tubes Christened By World Champ Italo Ferreira

The World Champ has had a busy offseason — including but not limited to towing Nazare, posting sweaty workout photos and recently sampling the first of what appears to be many tubes in Palm Springs, California. So far, only one blurry image has been leaked but it came with a verbal account of God’s chosen one dominating man’s creation with shuv-its, superman airs, etc. 

Sidenote: He’d probably win the Surf Ranch comp if that wave wasn’t pretty much a tidal bore. 

Now, can we critique the critique of a 12-year-old girl? 

Of course. This is surfing, after all. Earlier this week, Stab posted an Instagram clip of our Ladybirds from last year’s Stab High. While most comments were positive, a few greasy fingers churned up some less than appreciative remarks. Because that’s normal. Sierra happened to drop a clip shortly thereafter, and it proved that this young lady ain’t just a bird. It’s never too early to roll out the Future World Champ claim. 

Let’s watch an incredibly nice person get very big barrels. 

No, no, this is not an Ace Buchan edit — but it’d be kind of funny if it was. Irish surfer Gearoid McDaid just released a short film and I’m choosing to feature it here for two reasons. Primarily because it’ll forever be a treat to watch someone thread a board through waves that could destroy flesh. And also because I once went to Ireland and Gearoid helped put me onto good waves without having any idea that I work for Stab and might one day write this little note. Thanks for that, G. 

Great people, the Irish. I highly recommend a trip. You’ll never taste a beer as rewarding as the patent Guinness after a cold, heavy session there. 

Too cold. Where can we get barreled and tan? 

Nicaragua. Fly into the politically unrestful capital of Managua, attempt to outrun the police after blowing through a checkpoint because you don’t want to pay a made-up fee for having a board bag on your roof, fail, deal with an angry police officer, pay him, get tubed for a week, drink an average beer called Toña, don’t buy a shirt, for real don’t buy a shirt, go home. And go to Ireland in the fall.

And are we feeling poetic? 

Yes. Always. There was a full moon this week. It inspired surfing’s premier voice on spirituality, BDPS, to drink 37 beers and write a comprehensive 2020 horoscope that will drop on the site next week. And maybe it inspired you to write a little poem? 

This is your last opportunity to pen an acrostic poem about a 2007 WCT surfer to potentially win a link to watch Stab High. I’ll show you mine if you’ll show me yours.

Double-grabs

Are

Valid

If

Done 

While 

Eviscerating 

Adriano,

Rodrigo,

Etc. 

Email yours to [email protected] by Wednesday of next week for a chance to be considered. 

One last thing: 

A surf cam was just installed at a wave that a few of us hold sacred. Maybe it will directly affect the crowd. Maybe it won’t. Either way, something about it feels wrong — although it will add a great degree of convenience on certain days. I live far from there at the moment and the whole thing is confusing. So I chose to approach it with that attitude that any rational human adopts when something confuses them.

Through hard work, ingenuity and collaboration, I worked with a friend to get a screenshot of him giving the camera the middle finger while the sun rises wonderfully over the Atlantic. It makes me feel at peace. 

Enjoy the weekend,

Brendan Buckley