Controversial Opinion: No One Needs To Yoga In Boardshorts

I don’t like stretchy boardshorts.

And not just because the powers-that-be commissioned this here list, prompted by a lovely EDM from New York brand Noah, advertising their new, no-frills (non-stretch) surfing trunks.

Feels like we’ve drifted from “performance” to a more “tech” approach for the pointier end of board short design, and that has to be a good thing. The thought that a percentage point more stretch is going to improve your surfing is frankly, a bit ludicrous. Especially for the layman.

However, whilst many have been trying to out-bell-‘n-whistles each other, there’s still plenty of passionate proponents of trad trunks that hold their own after a week of wearing in saltwater. Come browse the racks full of good, stiff, surf shorts. Let’s walk.

Birdwell Beach Britches

Quite literally the original and the best. American made (would love to see Donnie T in a nice tight star spangled pair), in the same damn Santa Ana factory, by hand, with a lifetime repair guarantee no less. “Quality is our gimmick” is the BBB tagline, originally coined by Surfer Mag publisher Steve Pezman, and boy haven’t they stayed true to that message. The best part is they literally get better with time.

Grab yourself a piece of history here.

Noah

The trunks that started it all (this list, not boardshorts as a whole). Noah’s a NYC brand (founded by former Supreme Creative Director Brendon Babenzien) that circles the fringe of surf (heavier in skate) and lets its product speak for itself — a la these trunks. The sheen, the shade, the pockets, the contrast stitching; safe to say they’ve struck a chord that only sounds out when we’re approaching boardshort perfection. Crafted from 100% nylon (woven in Japan) and assembled in Sri Lanka, they’re the perfect mix of tech – all the pockets, but with mesh drainage so you don’t balloon in the drink – and traditional style that’ll have you covered for a day of trekking or surfing alike. Preferably both.

Perfect for ripping and sipping alike.

Seager

Seager are a bastion of tasteful Californian design with a nod to the hallowed past, and the Dos Rayos trunks are no exception. You might look a lil funky trying to stab three to the beach on a 6’1, but if you’re into logging, hitting the sun lounger or even wiggling a fish down a slopey point, then these fruity camo numbers are a home run.

Best foot forward Cali surf cool.

Quiksilver

Quik have been making some version of the Original Boardshort since their ’69 inception (hence the name, duh) and they’re as clean an effective as ever. Eighteen inches, any colour so long as it’s black, the original mountain and the wave logo (easily one of the best of the OG branding bunch), and guaranteed to let you fly under the radar at any surf spot around the globe.

If it ain’t broke…

Yellow Rat

Who is Yellow Rat? A question that’s literally plagued me for years. Still don’t know, but they (he!?) have a fully functioning website now, so regardless of who the Yellow Rat is, you can now browse two full pages of flawless trunks, including a lovely take on the Birdwell-style, contrast stitch/panelling pictured above.

Sample the wares of an enigmatic master trunk-maker.

Katin

Another brand with bombproof boardshorts heritage is Katin, the Surfside, CA brand first turning sails into surf shorts in the 50s, no less. The Waterman short is the essence of investing in a pair robust trunks set to last you into the future. Contrast stitching, an amazing shade of fire hydrant red that’ll slowly fade so perfectly over the decades, and 100% Nylon reversed flight Satin fabrication. Chef’s kiss.

Divine trunks since ’54.

Billabong

Bong use stretch as standard across their premium trunk line, but these here “Throw Ons” are part of a hybrid range of walk shorts/trunks that’re fit for errands and surfing alike. At 21″ they’re definitely aimed at the kids. However, if you’re jumping on a last minute jaunt to the tropics somewhere and bag space is at a premium, then these’ll be a godsend (nicely styled by the ‘Bong team in the lifestyle shots if you need some inspo too).

New take on a classic vibe.

Pilgrim Surf Supply

It’s no mean feat to keep a surf shop open in Brooklyn for over a decade, but Pilgrim Surf Supply have tastefully navigated their way to borderline institution-status. Unsurprisingly, they can pump out a sleek no-frills pair of trunks, and if you’re after a pair of solid shorts that’ll have you covered day after day then the 100% recycled polyester (manufactured in Japan!) Quiggs have got you covered.

Clean and effective surf shorts.