Kelly Slater To Narrate Julian Assange Documentary
More twists than a pretzel factory.
‘He put out information people didn’t want being put out but it was all truthful and I don’t know how you fault a guy for putting out the truth,’ mused Kelly Slater in an Instagram soliloquy one March eve.
Just as seamless as Slater’s transitions are from the tube to the open face, so too are his analyses of complex geopolitical, health and social issues.
Typically one should have domain-specific expertise, some skin in the game, to credibly navigate these deep waters — but 11 surfing World Titles and a few compelling exchanges with high-profile pod bros works fine too in 2023.
Way less student debt too, this method. And more barrels.
Slater’s sentiments did not go unnoticed by Kym Staton — director of the forthcoming opus delving into the character assassination of WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, who faces a 175 year prison sentence if extradited to the US for the crime of leaking classified information.
Originally titled Free The Truth: Free Assange has gracefully segued into the more enigmatic appellation, The Trust Fall.
“The main aim of this film is to gather more support for Julian’s freedom. At its core, this is a political case and a mass public outcry is needed in order to pressure US, UK, and Australian politicians to do the right thing and release him,” writes Staton — whose endgame is to whip up a chorus of cheers for Assange’s parole. He’s slapping a big ol’ megaphone on this whole political mess, hoping to rile up enough people from the US, UK, and Australia to gang up on their politicians and demand, ‘Let the man loose!’
The big twist is that Kelly Slater has scored a role in this flick — as a narrator, specifically.
To paraphrase Staton’s explanation: ‘Look, we know it’s like sticking a kebab in a fruit salad, but hear us out. This movie isn’t just for the politics nerds; we’re gunning for anyone with a pulse. And how do you do that? You rope in the big shots — the folks who’d rather ride waves or binge reality TV than sit through a political snooze-fest. So yeah, Slater’s on board to reel in the masses.’
Pink Floyd’s Roger Waters and U.K. rapper M.I.A. are other celebs singing the Assange song, co-narrating with the GOAT.
Kym is currently waving the flag over at GoFundMe to pay for production expenses — if you’ve got some spare change jingling in your pockets, why not toss it into the pot?
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