Sofa Delivery Man And Beautiful-Toothed Brit Surf Frigid Left Tube Despite Unwelcoming Locals And Smelly Sink Water - Stab Mag

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Sofa Delivery Man And Beautiful-Toothed Brit Surf Frigid Left Tube Despite Unwelcoming Locals And Smelly Sink Water

Did we miss anything?

elsewhere // May 21, 2022
Words by Michael Ciaramella
Reading Time: 2 minutes

There’s a lot in this title. But before we start stumbling down these wobbly Welsh cobblestones, let’s meet our characters.

First up is Patrick Langdon-Dark, a spry goofyfoot whose knees were made from the same stock as Reubyn Ash. Patrick came 13th in this year’s European Qualifying Series, just outside of the CS cut. He repairs and delivers sofas at his father’s local business to fund his surfing/goals.

Then there’s Logan Nicol, who despite being a Brit has exceptional teeth and is the current Welsh surfing champion. Logan works at the local surf school to fund his surfing/goals.

Logan and Patrick live in major Welsh cities. Logan comes from Cardiff (the country’s capital), and Patrick is from Swansea — once heralded the heroin capital of the UK. So there’s plenty to do when the waves are flat.

Still can’t get over Logan’s teeth.

Both surfers spent the majority of their lives being made fun of by their peers, for electing to surf rather than following Britain’s “normal” rugby/soccer lifestyle.

“Oi, get a load’a these chaps with their silly little leotards. Bloody pooftas, ay.”

Logan and Patrick endured the daily torment and emerged stronger for it. Now when they visit surf spots with unwelcoming locals, it’s water off their back.

That’s where Paul Gill, an OG in Europe surf exploration, comes into play. He served as the host/head of security on this trip, mostly to keep our protagonists in good favor with the local boys. Then there’s Mark Vaughan, a friend of Patrick and Logan’s, who took annual leave from work to drive 10 hours total for one surf. Can’t knock the dedication.

Local hostility and frigid waters aside, the boys’ local accommodations were also far from accommodating, as their 7th-century homestay still had its original walls and non-level floors, making sleeping a challenge. Best of all, their rooms were fitted with a sink that was simply unusable due to the stench of the water.

But hey, at least the waves were fun.

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