Bruce Irons has a place under and among the stars (including his big bro Andy, superstar skater Dany Way and moustachioed croner Donie Frankenreiter) at the Princevile Ocean View Resort Community, just behind world-famous Hanalei Bay in Kauai…
Photos by Brian Bielman
Interview by Adam Blakey
The press release of the POVRC makes for electrifying reading. It trumpets:
“Princeville at Hanalei is a premier Ocean View Resort Community located on the North Shore of Kauai, Hawaii. Our home sites feature premium views of lush green Sea Cliffs, picturesque Hanalei Bay, two Championship Golf Courses and where the most beautiful scenery in the world surrounds you. Home sites provide premium views in a serene atmosphere, with easy access to the fitness facility,
horseback riding in the mountains or overlooking the ocean, beautiful beaches, great golf, and eclectic shopping. Whether you are raising a family or enjoying a well-earned retirement, Princeville at Hanalei provides an environment where you can make the most of life as it was meant to.”
Curious. Because as far as Stab is aware, Bruce has neither a family nor is close to retirement. And is eclectic shopping and horseback riding really his bag? Adam Blakey investigates…
× So, let’s talk about your new pad. It’s in a place called Princeville. Does Prince live there?
Not that I know of. That’s be cool though.
× What attracted you the Princeville Ocean View Resort Community?
It’s on the North Shore of Kauai. Mia and I just moved in about three months ago. It’s not really a house, though. It’s more like a complex. In one complex there’s three units and we got one unit. We bought it before it got built. They’re nice homes. They’re across from the golf course and shit. To be honest it’s more of an investment for me. It’s the kind of place I’m only thinking of living in for two
or three years. I got this other piece of land I’m gonna start building on and that’s gonna be more my dream house. It’s still in Princeville but it’s further up the hill with no neighbours and I’ll be able to look straight down on Pine Trees from up there which will be insane. But the place I’m in now, it’s nice and clean, it’s got air conditioning and a good pool facility and all that kind of stuff. It’s small and
cosy. It’s nice.
× I believe the resort is a planned Gay Community?
(Note: At the editor’s bidding, I try to bait Bruce by pretending to mix-up the terms Gay and Gated community. It’s ridiculous, of course, but you never know your luck. Truth is stranger than fiction afterall. Bruce doesn’t flinch – cooler than ice cold).
Um, it’s not gated but it is in a kinda closed off community. It’s got a little rock wall around the whole place. It’s not really gated but it’s kinda gated.
× Is it a tight community? Do you gel with the neighbours?
You know what, the old people that live there are kinda pricks. But, fuck, there’s me, my brother lives there, Danny Way has a place a couple doors down, Donovan Frankenreiter has a place a couple of doors down and my good friend Uncle Warren has a place too, so we kinda run the show.
× Yes! Gangs of New York style. Who’s the leader of your neighbourhood posse?
There’s no leader but there’s a board – the board of Princeville – it’s a grumpy old board with all the old people on it but whatever. Between me and Andy and Donovan, Danny and Warren we can do whatever we want.
× Man, Donnie must look fucking hilarious turning up to those board meetings all flared and hairy to talk lawns and garbage nights with all the old dudes in their pink polo shirts and white loafers and shit.
Yeah, fuck, I’d never go to those board meetings. They’re kinda too strict for me.
× So you have a sweet good garage to house
No I don’t. My car fits in my garage okay but my truck is lifted too high so it doesn’t fit. But there’s guest parking directly beside my unit and I just hijacked that thing and took it over so that it’s part of my garage.
× Describe your wheels at the moment?
I got a Cadillac CTSV and a Chevy diesel 2500. The car is brand new and the truck is secondhand. I needed to change trucks because I bought this new boat and my old Ford couldn’t pull it. It’s a big boat so I needed to get a big heavy-duty turbo diesel and the thing is like a fucken tractor. The Cadillac was a present to me from Volcom and I think it’s about 62 grand’s worth. The truck cost 28 grand. You got pictures of them right? I took pictures in front of both of them. Mia’s naked on the hood in one of them.
× Ha! I think someone must have taken that one home cause I didn’t see it.
That sounds about right.
× So what’s with the Buddhas around the house?
We got a lot of Buddhas just for the vibe, cool vibes and all that. My chick got one and then I got this really cool one that Koby gave me. It’s a three-dimensional gold one from his buddy who does em in Indo. When I was in Australia a couple of years back, in Maroubra, I went to Koby’s and I was telling him, “Fuck that thing’s sick!’ And he was all, “You like it? Take it.” He took it off his wall and gave it to me. It’s one of the coolest things in my house. It’s threedimensional and everyone who comes to my house looks at it and trips out.
× Do you actually practice Buddhism?
I’m not a Buddhist but they have good vibes and whatever gives you good vibes man, I’m into it.
× What’s the closest beach to your pad?
Well, Princeville is up on hill at Hanalei and it’s about a five-minute drive down to Pine Trees, my local spot. So yeah, it’s right there.
× So is a normal morning for you go: wake up, cup of Joe, jump in the big rig and head down to Pineys for a surf check?
Yep. Well, in the summer time it’s flat but it’s only another five-minute drive to another spot and it kinda breaks all year round. It gets windswell so you can surf waist-high grovel waves which is good for a little wiggle around. It keeps you surfing. Keeps you training.
× What about when there’re no waves? Did you throw down some green on decking the joint out in Bing Lee’s finest?
Yeah. I spent fucking 12 grand just on the whole surround sound thing alone. My friend is actually an electrician and he hooked us up. I got Bose surround sound through the whole house and even in the garage. Every single room. Then I got flatscreens, downstairs and upstairs. I got a pimped-out white couch too. I’m not sure exactly how much I would have spent total but I wasn’t holding back. Oh and I got a fucking wine cellar downstairs. I always wanted a wine cellar.
× Are the racks in good shape?
It’s getting drained really fast (laughs). I don’t know a whole lot about wine but I’m pretty interested in it. Everywhere I go around the world I always try to get a bottle to collect and put in the cellar to drink at a good time. I love wine.
× Ever freaked yourself out by buying a really expensive bottle?
Not really, but every year when we go to France we go this friend’s restaurant to eat duck and every time he busts out a 1994 Bordeaux – this shit is strictly for reserved customers. Anyway, about six years ago he gave me a bottle to take home. I’ve had it the whole time and I actually planned to drink it when I moved into the house. But now I’m fucking shit scared to open it. I can’t do it. It’s like my little baby or something. I want to drink it but I’ve blown it by waiting too long.
× Imagine if one of the boys wandered down
into the cellar and cracked that thing without knowing. Oh, I would fucking wig out big time.
× So you hid it away nice and safe when you had the housewarming?
You know what? I didn’t even have a housewarming. Wow, that’s weird. I didn’t have a housewarming yet.
× I would have thought it’d be “Pipe House comes to Kauai” when you moved into that crib?
Fucking, if you knew my friends and what they’d do if we had a party there. My white couch would be a black couch
by morning (laughs). × I take it the “door is always open to all the boys” nature of the Pipe House doesn’t
apply to your place? My house on Kauai is kinda away from everyone. It’s secluded and no-one really bothers me. It’s my own space.
It’s cool having Donovan and my brother so close. It feels like you’re close to good people even when you’re
enjoying some alone time. But generally no-one just busts in unannounced.
× Does Donnie ever come round and jam with you?
No but (laughs) his son Hendrix is always coming around and asking for wax and stuff.
× Classic, he’s like Dennis the menace and you’re cranky old Mr Wilson who he comes over to hang out and ask a bunch of questions when you’re trying to have a nap and shit. Yeah, he’s an awesome kid. It’s pretty funny.
× How important is it to have you’re own space at this time of your life? Are you feeling like home is where your heart is?
I can’t really explain how important it is to me right now. I’ve got the beach and hanging out with all my boys but sometimes you just want to go home and relax. I’m really loving it. My friends know that when I’m at home it’s pretty rare for me and they respect that. It’s no big deal but little things like calling before they come over and stuff like that can really give you a lot of space.
× Did you ever dream you’d own a house at the ripe old age of 27?