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The 2013 Stab Awards

In the oddly-monopolised realm of surf awards, the ill-fitting collars and awkward speeches and strict nature of it all dips its toes in cringe. The Stab Awards are our take, our view, our pick of the people in our world who we believe made the right noise last year. Scroll the gallery below for all our winners. Oh, and the trophies themselves are the teeth of naturally deceased sharks, repurposed in black and yellow (echo) to be worn around the necks of sickeningly good surfers.

All portraits by Richard Freeman

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The Living Embodiment of Surfing:

Mason Ho

01_MASON

Mason Ho is the one surfer whose game, from his style to his mood to the vibrato of his vocal chords, fits… exactly… what surfing is. A little bit acid, a little bit crazy, a little wise, a little pretend dumb, but all wrapped up in the banana leaf of good times.

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Best Editing of A Surf Motion Picture:

Dane Reynolds (Slow Dance)

02_DANE

Dane Reynolds is a full-time surfer and part-time editor whose work on the biopic Slow Dance was marked by an instinctive and dramatic flair. Dane’s use of effects, archival footage and surprise cuts were the paint strokes of the free-flowing and unschooled mind.

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The Hello, Analytics! Award:

Sage Erickson

00_SAGE

Sage Erickson owns surfing’s cutest smile and the most viewed article on Stabmag.com, ever. She delights in every way. Her starring role in Stab‘s The Soft Night made our web servers groan. And in the water, such smooth! Miss Erickson surfs with the pizzazz we like, the power we like, and also the feminine stylings we like. What ain’t to love?

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Fine Art Calligraphy:

Conner Coffin (J-Bay)

03_CONNER_COFFIN

In our current lust for a grabbed rail attached to a lofty air, surfing has drifted away from the other ideal: stunning and artful rail surfing. Last year at Jeffreys Bay, South Africa, Conner Coffin demonstrated how lovely it is to hold a rail, not with hand, but with the power of feet, thighs and hams. Is there a finer signature in modern surfing? That’s a rhetorical question, by the way.

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Best Use Of Prop Animals

Courtney Jaedtke

00_NAPKIN_02

Who is this woman? Who is this genius with the ability to gift three dogs the most beguiling of human qualities? There is Pam, there is Boogie and there is Truffle, a French Bulldog, an English Bulldog and an Albino Labrador. But outfitted in home-made space outfits, as hard-bitten wharf workers, as… whatever the prevailing zeitgeist demands. Part social comment, part vaudeville and part loving tribute, Courtney’s accounts @napkinapocalypse and @pamlovesferrariboys are so gusto driven!

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Best Brand Identity:

Globe

04_GLOBE

A common mistake among surf brands is to drift away from what made that company fabulous in the first place; to put their faith in the arch-fickleness, the whims, of fashion. Globe is a surf brand that knows what it is, who it is and in what direction its energy flows. From the surf movies of the brilliant Joe G and its contribution to magazine editorial across the world to the classic simplicity of Dion Agius’ Los Angered leather high-tops, Globe produces what we want to see, wear and feel.

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The O.G. Award

Freddy Patacchia

00_FREDDY

Freddy Patacchia holds it down in every way. He’s Hawaiian, he’s raw, he spears Pipe and scalps rookies in world tour heats with equal aggression. This is a man of passion and power, but also of the best kinda humility. He balances fierce and likeable oh, so well. Get this man on a right with some juice and his backside serve is one of our sport’s most rad. He’ll then deliver the best post-heat interview of the day. Never change, Freddy.

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Raddest New Brand:

Epokhe

05_EPOKHE

Kai Neville, Dion Agius and Mitch Coleborn were driven to create their own sunglass label by the absence of any existing brand making what they wanted to paint their faces with. Epokhe is that classic small brand that doesn’t try to second-guess the market. Each of its principal owners already has a liveable income. This is a brand, therefore, that wants to make a cultural as well as a sartorial contribution. Profit? Yeah, well, that’d be nice. But let’s make the world beautiful one face at a time. Epokhe makes what it likes. And the people respond.

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Owning 2013 (Off Tour):

Noa Deane

06_NOA

From stealing the show in the Dane Reynolds-crafted movie Loaded (Big Spin!) to gobbling so many hundreds of editorial pages, 2013 was the year of Noa Deane. Were we correct in being absorbed by Noa? Can we put it this way? If Noa was dying of starvation outside our window we would go out (quickly!) and give him a smile and money for food! What a heaving, greasy skillet he is! Our happiness toward Noa approaches ecstasy!

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Enduring Awesomeness:

Jeremy Flores

07_JEREMY

This is a man who builds a skate factory and shares it to keep kids off the street. Who winters, like, really winters, in Hawaii alongside lifelong pal Sunny Garcia. Who ain’t afraid to stand inside the Teahupoo crucible. Who partied for two years after winning the Pipe Masters. What a divine spark. It’s exhilarating! Jeremy lights a spark at the apex of our souls.

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Breaking Stab’s Search Engine:

Craig Anderson

08_CRAIG

Create the movie of the year (Slow Dance) and surf in the most genteel manner, occasionally even balls-out, and you’ll make Googling fingers sweat horribly.
Craig. Anderson. Surfer. Slow. Dance. Style. Craig is created upon so many layers. There is the sartorial layer with his groovy hair (and to think, six years ago such a hairdo seemed…defiant!), there’s the original straight stove pipes and the crisp white shirts. And the surfboards (Hyptos! Singles!). His results are magnificently huge! The most searched surfer on stabmag.com.

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Congratulations to the winners. You please Stab!

  • tropical

    Im going to come back here this afternoon to see how much shit Dion/Epokhe/hipsters are about to cop

    • Charlie Conway

      Flynn? Flynn Novak??? Is that you?!

      • tropical

        You’ve found me! I couldn’t figure out a clever way to work ‘Flynn Novak’ into a username so I just settled for Tropical

  • Frank Smith

    Is this like the Australian Music Awards ‘Whose in town? Lets award them for the flight over and throw in some random locals awards ‘?

    • bananes

      Rumors say that due to small pros attedance they gave awards also to the bartender and the cleaning lady

  • marky marc

    does anyone give a shit?

  • AZ
    • bitter guy

      award for most posts taken down after a sharp “wtf” from the peanut gallery: Kolohole Bandino (good looks AZ)

  • Rohan4

    Hater gonna hate but I reckon ando’s section in loaded was fking remarkable. Some of those drops man. He holds an incredible line with his boards. Great to watch.

  • stab

    im disappointed there wasn’t an award for the most vocal brazilian on the stab forums.

  • broguy

    how fucking ugly is sage in that photo. my god is it just me or is she starting to resemble http://images.smh.com.au/2013/09/18/4756702/mf-narrow-rebel-20130918104424302725-300×0.jpg

    • jasper hash

      hahhahahahha thats so f*cked mate

  • broguy

    sage is looking weathered. sorta resembles Rebel Wilson. for reference – http://images.smh.com.au/2013/09/18/4756702/mf-narrow-rebel-20130918104424302725-300×0.jpg

    • ASP Judge

      i think her name makes her hotter than she is

      • Ghee

        Sage is a delicious herb particularly when sautéed in butter and served with Chicken. If it was requested i would eat any part of Sage that was offered to me. Yum!

  • ASP Judge

    Is this a piss take? These awards were obviously made up on the night to fit in with whoever was there..
    And come on Cote at least come up with some more thought out categories.. ‘best use of prop animals’? ‘O.G. award’? ‘enduring awesomness’?

    Take them all back and express post 15 gay necklaces to John John.

    • dizzeeP

      lmao, agreed

  • broguy

    I wanna sock courtney.

  • frothdog

    “Punt your mates / pro surfers and their lame sunnies brand and get some booze brands to shamelessly self promote & pick up the bill for the party ‘award’ ceremony”. In other “news” Agius and coleburn ended the night 69′ing on the dance floor. best use of a stuffed animal was 1 of the promo girls using her crotch fro to wipe the jizz off their faces

  • James B

    WOWWWW!! Did you guys have noticed what happened with Stab´s Kolohe Andino last video posted two days ago??? DELETED by STAB!! Oh, my god, can you guys imagine the short circuit in Hurley´s marketing guys brain with the shockwave of sad comments about his 2mill/year (not) phenom?? Stab, Stab… censoring????

    • Rohan4

      Good catch. I was wondering about that too. Pathetic that they pulled it. Stab a grovelling commercial entity to the big brands$. Just be honest guys. We like your mag and work, but just be honest.

      • bitter guy

        lost a ton of respect, actually

        • dd

          What was in the video that lead to it being deleted?

          • bitter guy

            a bunch of weak wraps that everyone laughed at

          • dd

            oh, that is a little bit different. Usually it’s the 50 air reverses per clip that people poke fun at

  • Jimmy Wilson

    Stab Awards are the best. Just make them up on the spot for whoever was available. It’s a genius idea. Hey if you come to our party we’ll give you a bad ass shark tooth neckalace and say something good about you. Can’t go wrong!

  • Stanly Nermalston

    What a WANK!

  • Ivan

    “Best use of prop animals”
    Such an interesting award.

  • Pingback: Mason Ho and Freddy P. Stab Award Winners!!! | Arnette Eyewear

  • Killian

    Not to mention that Flores is paying the full cost of Joanne Defay season on the WCT as she is without a sponsor…

  • bananes

    oh no, there should be also a “more likes on instagram award” and the “best hashtag use award” and “i want world peace award”……..best use of prop animals award? seriously?

  • poopyfinger

    who the fucks noa deane?

All Styles